C and I are having a rough week. Between meltdowns, disrespectful actions, and down right disobidance I am at my wits end. I have been turning for guidence anywhere I can get it and the guidence sucks. Every Pro-Parenting resourse advice, I already do it, and do it consistantly. And it seems that no two Christian authors provide the same framework. I am not a spanker, never have been, so that is out of the question as a normal happening - it is not something I would be able to stick to or to consistantly apply. We have used timeouts and they have really worked until recently. Here is a quick run down;
In November I took C to the doctors and explained that I felt he was aggressive and lacked attention. She assured me that he was not ADD or ADHD and said it was a phase, that he could be coerced out of it with even more positive re-enforcement. She offered a plan which we are still following. The aggression has subsided, but seems to be lying just under the surface. Now it seems that the all the positive attention has created a really ... I can't even think of a good description, he is just either testing us to the nines, or is suffering, it is so hard to tell which. The other day he had a fit at the bowling alley - a really loud one, then today he took food from the fridge that I specifically told him not too. (He was sent to his room) It seems I need to up the ante, but with what?
Then there is the guilt. I have enough for a whole boat load of people. I know C would be happier at a real school. He longs to be other kids without me on the sidelines. He begs for it. I feel awful and defeated. First, there is not an opportunity to drop him off at an activity and pick him up later - it seems all home-schoolers around here hover over their children - plus each event they plan mandates that you be there. Second, the school here is too dangerous, period. His safety and his education would be in danger, and as a mother, I could not allow it. Why not move you ask? I want to so badly, but Joe just never complies. I can't take it anymore.
I think it is just the guilt that has me so worked up. I think I am just going to start taking away TV, by the day, it is really his only true currency.
2 comments:
Uh, what a position. Parenting is such work, isn't it? I don't have any advice for you but I'll be praying! I wish you had a better situation homeschool-wise or school-wise where you're at. I know you're doing a great job schooling him but when he desires to be w/other kids a lot and you're not finding that, that's tough! Have you looked online at all to see if there are any groups aside from the big one? Sometimes they're disguised as Yahoo groups or something? Praying, my friend!
Sounds like he is just a typical little boy. Nothing works with my kids, although With Jesse taking away his DS or video games is what we do. Maybe you can take away his favorite toy and let him know he can have it back when his behavior improves. Wish you luck. I know it can be a struggle.
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