Saturday, October 31, 2009

Candy! Candy!

So, I ended up taking C to the base last night for trick-or-treat time. We didn't have a plan or anything we just sort of showed up. First we went to our old neighbors house and it was just 6:00, start time. T was so happy to see us and so were the kids. We haven't seen them since September. The kids were all so thrilled to see each other they were hugging and laughing and saying "we miss you, are you moving back in here?" and C said "No, we're just visiting, but we wanted to see you first because your my best friends." It was so sweet and cute. C and triplets were all just too cute. J was even wearing one of C's old costumes! The kids asked if we could go trick-or-treating with them and of course I said yes. So their dad, D, and I took the four kids door to door in the old neighborhood. After the first 20 or so house D said "okay kids, we're rounding the block so Miss Jamie and go back and hang out with Mommy and I am taking you to 100 HOUSES YEAHHHHHHHHHH!" The kids were just tickled pink and so was I. D was so nice to offer to take C out trick-or-treating while I crashed at his house unannounced and hung out with T. In the end I had so much fun I didn't want to leave.

Eventually we met up with A and her family. Again the kid were happy to see each other, but it wasn't the excitement we had with T & D's kids. We went to a few house and then all the kids wanted to stop, they were getting tired. A invited us to hang out at her house for awhile, but when I asked C he said "I just really want to go home and get into my nice comfy bed". I ended up declining the offer and telling her that we could not get together on Saturday. I explained that it was just too much for us and we were getting spread too thin. She was perfectly happy with that explanation and happy to agree we'd get together soon. I was relieved. I wanted to go, but I just couldn't do another trip out there so soon. It is too much.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Oh Crap

Apparently Bolling Air Force Base is full of moronic self indulgent ass holes. I knew I didn't like that place when I lived there. I am so annoyed. They scheduled trick-or-treating for today, FRIDAY, instead of Halloween, which is tomorrow. I am upset because I didn't know and because we had so many plans for that day which will now be impossible. I am so flustered. Friday traffic is sooooo bad and I have to be near DC anyway for a dentist appointment today, so I am considering visiting with friends and just staying there until candy time. That would mean we miss out on Costume Bingo at C's school which is tonight. It also means we will be home tomorrow and have to buy candy, if we choose too. Either that or C could trick-or-treat twice, I am sure to him that is the best plan. I am just so disappointed. If we stay here and go to the school that means we cannot eat dinner and hang out with our dear friends back in DC tomorrow because C will be trick-or-treating in a NORMAL city. I was so looking forward to it.

Also - in other news: Scott is on my list. He can be so darn self righteous sometimes. I don't get it. Even after I slept on it I am still thinking about our exchange of words last night. Basically it comes down to what a few of my friends have told me, sometimes, most of the time, your husband doesn't want you to have anything but happy thoughts and butterflies flying around in your head.

I don't have butterflies, currently I have a calender and all I can see is that it is filling up everyday. I am too busy and the house seems to be falling apart. I had to rearrange my schedule this week because C needs to go to the Dentist. Even though G said I could now make my own hours, as soon as I try to do that he fussed. I feel terrible about it. Now the whole trick-or-treat deal is in the way and things just aren't what I've planned.

How silly is it? I mean Tuesday I was fine. Monday I was great. Well, better go, I have to get C ready for school, which means I need to pry him away from Sponge Bob.

And one more thing - MY MICROWAVE BROKE! And it is only like three or four months old! I think it shorted out - faulty wiring in the kitchen. How annoying.

One good note, my friend, K, is due soon with their little boy. This weekend I am going to go shopping for a gift for them. It might end up being a gift card to where ever they are registered - it they are but either way I am going to have fun picking it out. I am so excited for them.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I Want My Stapler

Today I arrived at the office a few minutes early; which is good because it gave me time to unpack a small bag of supplies I brought in from my old job. I had a box of paperclips, a stapler, a trashcan, rubber bands, and highlighters; all of which were void in my new office. By five past ten I was typing away and scanning a new bill when G walks through the door. We exchange hellos give updates on the kids and then he proceeds to set up his laptops.

G and I share a desk. I use the good side and he uses the side guests would normally sit at in an office. There are a few network cables set up because he broke our router a few weeks ago. When he begins to plug these cables into his laptop he notices my pink stapler and asks if it is mine. I tell him that I had a few left over supplies from my old job and thought I would donate them. He seems pleased but then as he finished hooking up the first of two laptops he bumps the stapler and says

"See I don't think we can have a lot of extras in here, they take up so much room and it is a small office." He was serious. I ignored the comment and instead answered with "you know the phone still isn't working?" G nicely ignore my question and said "We should make sure to work on the insurance today" I nodded and said "We should really get a shredder." At this he sort of cocked his head to one side, not unlike my Golden Retriever does when she wants a snack, and says "what are we talking about?" I just laugh and say, "my pink stapler, I want my stapler" His head bobbed from one side to the next and then he just smiled and went to get coffee.

Really G, my stapler is taking up too much room?

And Down She Goes

Yesterday I had two choices: 1. Go to church and get my nails done or 2. Go to work. I chose number 1. Sadly it was because I so badly wanted my nails done and had little to do with checking out the daily mass offered at our church. But without getting into to much detail - the mass was nice and I think I will try to go a few days a week once Advent starts.

The story is the nails:

So I go to Star Nails, which is a chain and which I like. The ladies running it normally make fun of you in an Asian language and start laughing. Once M (My sister) and I went and the ladies kept asking if we wanted to get waxed too, when we said no they started laughing. We were border line humiliated - but at the same time just started cracking up. Anyway, the last time M and I went we made sure we both tweezed our eye brows before going. So yesterday, I go myself. I tweeze, I shave, give myself the once over and I go.

The message was fantastic - probably the best I have had. During which the lady said "you have soft legs. Except this line here - do you want me to wax?" Yea - apparently I missed a spot shaving! I declined the wax. Next she does the mani pedi and after an hour of pampering it is time for me to go. But I forgot my flip flops so the lady lets me keep these little foam ones they put on you for the pedicure. Well, as discussed I have flippers. So my toes sort of hang off the front and a sliver of my heal off the back. But whatever - I was only parked a few spaces from the door.

Upon exiting the salon I cringe because it is still raining. I gingerly walk out across the parking lot and oh so gracefully slide about ten feet with my arms flailing about, one leg up in the air, one hand trying to stop me and my keys flying across and hitting a car. As I am sliding these darn fake flip flops are coming apart and I am just praying no one really notices me. It seemed like an eternity until my knee finally broke my fall and I was able to stand up get me keys and rush into my car. Nails - so wrecked. (But not all that bad, I was able to fix the few that were wrecked at home) Once I get to the car I look back where I fell and notice one of the flip flops - I just left it there. I slid on those white and yellow lines painted on the ground. They are so slick when they are wet!

Only me.

Monday, October 26, 2009

The Big Flood


On Saturday it rained so hard and so fast here that we thought our house was going to go under. The golf course behind the house had waves of water gushing over it. In between our house and the course is a small gully with a run off drain from a local creek, it completely flooded and was spilling over. The water raised to about six feet above what it normally is. Luckily the water receded rather quickly in the end but The whole while this was happening I was on the phone with my sister M, who must have gotten a little annoyed that I kept interrupting her good news about chapter requests and moving just to give her the water update. Poor girl, if it isn't C distracting me every two minutes it is me with silly updates. Anyway the flood had me thinking:

I know it is an older joke - but it makes me laugh and think; how may life lines do we need? Maybe more than three.

It had been raining for days and days, and a terrible flood had come over the land. The waters rose so high that one man was forced to climb onto the roof of his house.As the waters rose higher and higher, a man in a rowboat appeared, and told him to get in. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the rowboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.The waters rose higher and higher, and suddenly a speedboat appeared. "Climb in!" shouted a man in the boat. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the speedboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.The waters continued to rise. A helicopter appeared and over the loudspeaker, the pilot announced he would lower a rope to the man on the roof. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the helicopter went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.The waters rose higher and higher, and eventually they rose so high that the man on the roof was washed away, and alas, the poor man drowned.Upon arriving in heaven, the man marched straight over to God. "Heavenly Father," he said, "I had faith in you, I prayed to you to save me, and yet you did nothing. Why?" God gave him a puzzled look, and replied "I sent you two boats and a helicopter, what more did you expect?"

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Oh So Important

Kohl's, Macy's, Sears, Lord N Taylor, and a variety of other stores sadly disappointed me today. I need boots. I don't need "holy snow batman" boots. I need good looking ones with mild traction in ice type of boots. After all, we only had two days of snow last year. But alas, I have flippers for feet and no one has any type of stock in a size 10. Sears came the closest, but the ones I liked were made for fat legs. I don't have fat legs - I've got skinny ones and boots just seemed to droop down them, even the spandex / microfiber ones. Rest assured I don't have the skinny issue with the rest of my body - so I happily bought three tops that fit great and were on clearance. Maybe I'll have to shop online for the boots.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

The Birthday Present

My mother-in-law sent me a list of things my father-in-law wants for his birthday / Christmas. Aren't we a little old for these type of lists? Apparently not so much. On the list was an assortment of pure crap. Sweat pants? Mouse pad? For crying out loud does he live in a retirement home? These gifts sound like something you get off a gift tree at the back of church during Advent. But hey - ask and ye shall receive.

Mouse Pad = 2.99
Sweat Pants = 8.99
Transfer Paper = 9.99

Cheap presents. I used my computer to make this collage of family pictures, printed it out and ironed onto the mouse pad, it is super cute. Then I made a USAF name tag for the sweat pants and ironed that on. My father-in-law now officially has birthday presents and I have transfer paper left over to use for Xmas gifts.

Just in case you were wondering - I am pretty proud of myself.

In other news: Today at the library I farted. Yes it is true, I tooted. This was a surprise squeaker that made me turn around to see who it was only to find out it was me! I don't think anyone really heard but I did hear someone laughing in the distance. Needless to say I exited the row and went back to the kiddie section with C and read the newest Cosmo. Did you know that Kim Kardashian wants people to stop asking her if her ass is real? Yes, I was at the library filling the aisles with a funky smell and my brain with an ass load of knowledge - pun intended.

And speaking of ass loads, I had ass loads of laughs when I watched the move Proposal with Sandra Bullock and regrettably Land of the Lost with Will Ferrel. The proposals was predictable but surprisingly made me laugh and it was pretty clean. In one part Sandra Bullock says to her costar, "why didn't you tell me you were the Kennedy's of Alaska?" HA! Land of the Lost was vulgar and hysterical in parts - C LOVED it. Although when we started watching it I thought it was PG but within two minutes realized it must have been PG-13 because they say ass, bitch, and a whole slew of other swears before they even get into the plot. Still both movies made me laugh and had some pretty funny parts.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Just Call Me Kathy

This morning I logged into the computer with hot coffee in hand. I pecked at the keys so I wouldn't have to put the cup down. I swear I really could have used a straight IV, but that is besides the point, as it is just my regular routine and routine complaint. I check email, eBay,, FB, and sometimes my bank account. This morning I was surprised that my bank account had seven-hundred dollars more than it did yesterday. We received a reimbursement from the Air Force for one of S's trips. But the payment, which normally is around five to seven days after his travel, was really delayed. So delayed that I forgot about it and paid his government CC when the bill came in full. So, now we get to keep the money. Granted we have bills to pay, but it sure was nice to see money in there so far after payday.

In other news I told a whopper today. I sold this brand new Columbia purple, pink and blue snow suit on Craig's List and the lady came to pick it up today. I bought the item at a thrift store for five bucks. It was new but didn't have tags. Although when I brought it home I found remnants of a tag. So anyway I list the snowsuit of CL because I couldn't get a really good picture of it for eBay. Blah, Blah, it sells. So the lady comes to the house today, and says "wow this really is new, why didn't you use it." and I say "I have a boy, apparently his grandparents are colorblind". Then we both laugh, I take her twenty bucks and smile all the way to my wallet. What the heck?!?! I might be losing what sanity I have left and completely turning into my mother.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

The Backpack

I am really trying to enjoy my new job, to be grateful that there is a job that is classified as "Mother's Hours", to be thankful that my boss is really a nice guy, and to be joyful in all things concerning work - even if it is a complaint, I want it to be in jest. My last job was so toxic and just plain hard that sometimes I think the only skill I took away from it was "what not to do".

Did I already blog about the backpack? I am not sure how I missed that. Last week G Money brought in a load of about 1500 pages of paper that were turned all directions and ways, some folded some not, some next to their mate some not, some in envelopes that had been open and some not, and all shoved into a backpack. A large backpack spilling over with paperwork, tax forms, passports (his families - he didn't even know then were in there), bank receipts, junk mail, just tons of stuff, some important some not.

So, that day at work I sorted the papers and got them all in the same direction, and in piles of taxes, bank, payroll, personal (there was a lot of G Money's stuff in there - like his colonoscopy report??) and other assorted piles of importance. Then I began to set up a filing system. By the end of the day everything was nice and neat and pretty. Then G asked me for a Federal Tax form. So I open the new file and it isn't there. It takes me about three minutes and I find it. The majority of the Federal forms he gave me were mailed from Utah, and on that particular form I looked at the return address and assumed it was the State of Utah form. I handed him the right form and double checked the Utah file to make sure I didn't mix anymore. Then G says:

G "You have to be very careful with this stuff, we cannot haphazardly move them into any file"

Me "As opposed to being in a backpack?"


So today I have to work, and already I am not really looking forward to it. Joyful Joyful Joyful, Darn it , I will be!!!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Sickness

C is sick. Yesterday I kept him home and for half the day he was FINE, the other half he ran a fever and had an upset tummy. The problem was that the halves were mixed, an hour here, two hours there. Anyway - this morning he woke me up at 2:00, and me in all my great mommy wisdom assumed it was between six and seven, so I plodded into the kitchen and started the coffee. Before I got too much into the routine I did notice the correct time, shut off the coffee pot and grabbed the kids Motrin before I went back up to bed. C was up and down almost every hour and finally around 6:00 his 102 fever broke. By 7:00 he was watching Sponge Bob had eaten a decent breakfast and was jumping from the couch to the coffee table while pretending the dog was Squidward ... so, I sent him to school.

I know the rule is 24 hours after a fever - but please he was fine. I pumped him full of 12 hour cough syrup and a fever reducer just to be safe and sent him to school with note telling his teacher he "presented with no symptoms other than a slight cough and has taken an OTC syrup." So far - no phone calls from the school.

In other sickness news: it is so early to talk about Christmas - but after the whole W deal and my planning Christmas events back in August - I have it on the brain and am secretly excited, for the good parts anyway. I found a dress at SteinMart over the weekend that would be perfect for the show... Jesus would be so proud of my addiction to material possessions in honor of his special day! I know, as always, I am so going to hell - sending my kid to school sick, longing for a new dress, keeping those LUCKY jeans, the list goes on and on - I wouldn't want to corrupt you with "the sickness".

Monday, October 19, 2009

W Family VK Planner

Last night we planned our vacations for 2010. I feel good. I feel great - I cannot wait.

January = Vegas
April = Massachusetts (if the relatives all behave!)
June = Camping
July = Camping
August = South Carolina / Camping
Then sometime in the fall a trip to Colorado for white water rafting and hiking

In January my mom said she'd come here to watch C for us while we were away. So awesome.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Oh Christmas

I might be the dumbest dumbass on the freaking dumb planet. Go ahead, say it - Jamie you are are dumbass. Although I said it and I don't really think it is funny. I am a dumbass. Is dumbass one word? Is it even a real word? Regardless, if it is a word, my name defines it.

S and I had this plan for the holidays this year. We would stay home. I planned an awesome gift / family day at Ford's Theater the week of Christmas to see our favorite play a Christmas Carol. We are so looking forward to it. I was also thinking maybe after Christmas we would go away for a few days, maybe to North Carolina or even Florida. But I didn't make those plans yet. To my utter dismay, I made alternative plans:

We all know my relationship with my in-laws is strained. That really might be an understatement. And no matter how much prayer goes into it I feel no peace over the issues - but I can't leave it alone. There has to be some sort of amicable medium. Did I blog about this already? Anyway I talked to L. Twice now since they left in AUGUST! We use to talk once a week. She called me a month ago. I was completely stunned and at the end a little miffed because she acted as though there were no problems or apologies needed. In order to keep a fake front of peace I just went along with it. Two weeks passed and I figured it was my turn to call. So I did. And somehow; only God knows how; I uttered these oh so magical words "Well why don't you guys come down here for Christmas, you're always welcome."

Go on - start screaming my chant "DUMBASS! DUMBASS!"

They are coming on the 22nd of December. So I take a deep breath and tell myself - good, no problem, we'll make it work. So today I have S call his parents and ask them if they'd like to join us for A Christmas Carol on the 23rd. I thought we'd buy the tickets and maybe see about renting a limo and make a big deal out of it - that would be a great gift right? Well, NO, they are not interested. They are concerned about the weather and how L will be feeling. And now it is apparent that they are worried about being alone with our dog. What ever - I'll send her to Pet Smart for the night. Already - I cannot make them happy.


Thursday, October 15, 2009

Bikini Bottom Oh How I Love Thee

This afternoon I ventured into the kitchen and grabbed a Diet Coke and a snack. With items in hand I planted myself on the couch and searched through the cable listings to see what was on. I, mother of the year, without even the slightest hesitation put on Sponge Bob. I was the only one home. I looked at the episode and my first thought was "oh, we've seen this one a few times" and then I realized, wait - I am the only one home, I DON'T HAVE TO WATCH THIS!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

False Witness'

You know I just typed this big long explanation and story and then just deleted it. I don't need explanations - it is my blog right?!?!?

Basically I am getting a little tired of false witness and at time good old fashioned witnessing. I have a FB friend who is posting all these new posts about the Godly life. Two months ago she posted things like "BEER... YUM" and "TGIF wheres the alcohol." So maybe shes changed, great hope she has, but it is so phony - new Christians praising all it erks me. Today she posted a really cool saying, but I wonder how true from her end. It is annoying.

Then there is issue I am having with another parent at C's school. Really it is no issue - I am just dwelling on it. Here is what happened, the conversation between my Friend A, myself, and another parent

A "my daughter saw Jesus in the jewelery store yesterday"

Me "What?"

A laughs and explains that "I was picking up my ring and A was looking in a case and saw a cross and started to get really excited and say "Mommy I see Jesus" "

Me laughing says "good times, C use to think homeless people in San Fransisco were Jesus because of their beards and crazy hair."

We both laugh and the other parent says "my daughter wouldn't make those associations, we don't do church"

Then I tell the parent how I was raised with out going to church but decided as a teen that I wanted to be Catholic. It was a quick story about me loving to go to bible camp and how I made my mother sign me up for a Mormon camp. (- In real life that is a funny story only because my poor sister had to go with me and hated every waking minute of it.) So after A and I giggled a little over that I got up and tended to the children.

A tells me later that she felt awkward talking to this parent and wanted to get to know her better so tried to start up a conversation when I left room. She asked her "so, can you just not find and church to go to?" Apparently the other parent didn't really answer and the silence stayed there until I returned. But I didn't know this until the other parent went home.

So now, I send this parent an email thanking her for the Bday gift she brought C and asking her if she'd like to get the kids together to play. She ignores my email. I do not have a telephone number for her or I would leave a message. Maybe she just isn't an email type of person. But it has been awhile.

A is so sweet and loving, and she sometimes just can't fathom why someone wouldn't want to go to church. I wonder if her pressing the issue made this parent not want to talk to me anymore. I don't know; but regardless can we just put the witnessing on hold? I know - I am going straight to hell.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Fun ... It's Contagious

What an afternoon. C was in a foul mood, S came home with a headache , I was getting annoyed because the chicken I took out for dinner was spoiled (darn commissary), and the left overs we ate instead weren't much better. So pretty much we had a house full of grumps. S went upstairs to lay down, he wasn't sure if it was a migraine, but he was not feeling well at all. C retreated to the TV room and I was tempted just to tool around online, but then I asked C if he wanted to ride bikes.

So, we go outside and C gets in his mustang instead of a bike and I drag out my bike. First we were just riding up and down the street but then we just started racing around in the circle. After about 30 minutes S comes out and takes a random picture of us - who knows why. Then C decides he wants to use his scooter. He stinks at the scooter. Well, I should say he use to stink at it. Tonight he zipped around it for over half an hour and was even inventing tricks. He was telling me all these stories about made up wars and Christopher Columbus. It was so sweet. Eventually he called S back out to watch his new tricks and we were all laughing and goofing around as a family.

S went back in and C and I rode around for a little while longer. Then when we went inside S surprised us by saying he felt worlds better after a short rest and a shower and he wanted to go search for golf balls with C. So the boys went out behind the fence and searched for lost balls. The found 14.

Maggie was all in a tiff because she couldn't go on that side of the fence, so I got out her tennis balls and a volleyball and started playing around. It was a blast. The dog is riot, she chases the balls and basically flips over them because she doesn't slow down when she tries to pick one up. The volleyball is even funnier, because she can't always get it in her mouth so she starts kicking it around like a soccer ball. It really felt good to be playing and hanging out with my family. I could see the boys in the gully having fun, Maggie and me were having fun running around and life was good.

Once it got dark we all came in and to my surprise the boys had plans to play a game. So here I am with time to blog, and check out my eBay sales. I did great, making over 200.00 minus costs is about $145.00 just in the last five days. I know it won't always be like this. I hit the Halloween costume deal at the right time and people way over paid for used costumes. (suckers :P)) I work for G Money tomorrow - blahhh real work.... I like my shopping job better.

I have Zumba in an hour. I am looking forward to it. Nothing like bouncing around singing Latin dance songs and making a complete fool of yourself. Good times - it really is contagious.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Quite the History

What a weekend. Good, bad, and great all rolled into one. I could make the story the so long and full of details but we'd be here until next weekend, so here are the memorable highlights:

  1. I RSVP'd to a party in NJ a long time ago, I wasn't really looking forward to it. C and I in the car for four hours just to go to a BBQ and then turn around and go home, all while I was still sick

  2. At the last minute S decided to go with us, he had other reasons; he made a deal with this guy in Red Bank, NJ to buy roughly 5000 baseball cards. The cards needed to be sorted, so S stayed up all night organizing. He never came to bed.

  3. We left really early for NJ so we could meet the guy - only to have him cancel three hours into our trip. So S was really disappointed and we were in the area way earlier than we needed to be.

  4. My parents were in the area so we called them and met up at Sandy Hook, Fort Hancock. An old base where my dad lived for a few years as a kid. It was awesome. He lived in a darn mansion and the place was so cool. Definitely made the trip worth it. We toured a mortar compound, went in to a museum house that looked like the one my dad lived in and took a little driving tour of all the places my parents use to go and where they got married. It was really a great experience. My father was asked by one of the tour guides to interview for their website and he was really excited about it. I can't wait to see it. For now you can check out the website at: it is so cool.

  5. The BBQ was short and sweet. We were an hour and a half late but that was a good thing. We ate we visited and then we claimed a big ride back and left. Perfection.

So that was the trip. In other news I set up an Ebay store. Which is doing great. Anyone interest can check it out at I am still working on the graphics. But hey - I got nothing but time :P)

Friday, October 9, 2009

Confessions of a Shopoholic

I love to shop.

I love to shop.

I love to shop.

I love to shop by MYSELF!

As you may have guessed I went shopping. I bought the largest amount ever for resale. It was fantastic. Lucky, Gap, LL Bean, and more for less than 150.00. Lucky jeans, NEW, the kicker - they are in my size and now I don't want to sell them. The closest I come to a name brand clothing is Walmart Levi's. LOL, well that and shoes - but it isn't like I get those at full price.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Call Janet, Ms Jackson if You're Nasty

Yes, I had a wardrobe malfunction. I didn't expose the girls to anyone... today, anyway. I did however spend the greater part of the morning with my fly down. Also, I took C to the bus stop this morning and slipped on a pair of socks and sneaks. When I got ready for work I kicked off the sneakers and put on a pair of heels (really cute Jessica Simpson's) but, I left my black socks on. I noticed during lunch as I was balancing my shoe on the end of my toe while waiting for my boss to actually swallow his food. Note to self, don't go to Moby Dick with G Money. (On the way in he told me he took his mother in law there and she vomited soon after eating, Great APPETIZER there!)

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Seriously, Shut the F UP

Are you F'ing kidding me?!?!? Apparently my pathetic luck with the CW and OTH is continuing to send me on a downward spiral. Actually I was already on the spiral just unaware of it. I am so ticked and not just at companies I have no real attachment or loyalty to. Oh where to begin...

  1. I need my own cell phone.
  2. I need my own GPS & the Indians to move out!
  3. I need my own camera
  4. I want my own money
  5. I want my own DVR
  6. I want a new elbow
  7. I want this darn cold to go away!

#1, my cell: Scott brings it on all his trips. He travels a lot. Last week he was suppose to go to New York. I drove him back and forth to the airport five different times while he tried to catch a flight that kept getting delayed and eventually canceled. The last trip turned out to be VERY expensive and scary.

S called around 6:40 to say his flight and his trip were canceled and to come get him. So I get C and Maggie rounded up. C was in Jammies already and Maggie just looked so sad that we were leaving the house, again. So I load in the troops and off we go. We got to the airport at 6:48 and drove around the pick up location six or seven times. By this time it is past seven, it was dark and I was thinking, well maybe at the last minute the flight took off. But I have no phone to call S and find out the scoop.

I decide to park in hourly parking and go inside the airport. Parking is four dollars and I knew that USAF would pay us back for that. As I am parking I see a sign that says NO PETS. Then it says that violators will be ticketed and could face possible jail time if pets are left in the cars. But by this time is is almost 7:30 and I am frantic trying to find S. So I tell C we just have to hurry up. I park in between to HUGE SUV's and hope no one can really see my smaller station wagon. Then I realize the kid has no shoes and is wearing only boxers and a thin T shirt. Luckily I he had left his ugly crocks in the back and I had a sweat shirt for him, but still it was cold and he was way under dressed. I felt like a terrible mother.

We run into the airport and search for a working pay phone. It took a few minutes. Finally we find one and of course I have no change. But you can use your debit card. But the phone doesn't really work. I tried a few times and then finally got a operator to help me. But I get voicemail. By this time I am convinced that the plane took off. So C and I run to the car and see a flashing light on top of a work truck stopped one vehicle away from ours. It is airport security. The guy was waiting for us! He sort of waved his hand to me while I was getting C in the car. Then another airport goer started asking this guy where the exit was, so I just took the opportunity and zipped out of there. I know the guy was going to say something to me, or worse give me the ticket.

Next we go around the airport a few more times and finally at almost eight we see S. He was P.O.ed to say the least. He was so exasperated by the airport and the workers there that he looked like a deflated balloon. I really felt so bad for him that I just did even complain about running around like a crazy women for the last hour and twenty minutes. He explained that right after he called me he realized he might need some sort of travel form from the airline to explain the mess because otherwise he might have an issue trying to get work to cover all the charges for the hotel, and his personal costs for the day. When he attempted this someone was helping him, said they'd be back and never returned. He had to ask two or three more people and it just took forever.

So we get home and I check the computer to see the payphone charge. I print out the charge or 5.00 and the parking fee of 4.00 and ask him to please try to put that money on his travel voucher. He did this the next day and was surprised they said yes so easily. Someone in the finance office even did all the paperwork for him just to be sure. It was great.

Fast forward to today. I check our bank account. The five dollar payphone charge dropped off and was replace by this:

Oct 5, 2009 IOS TEL TO 5083402595 800-2262606 TX DEBIT CARD PURCHASE ($35.95)

I called that 800 number to complain, thinking that was accidental charged for the seven or so times I tried the call before talking to the operator. I was so wrong and was told I had the opportunity to ask the operator the rate. The call was three minutes in duration. I argued as politely as I could and just said I had no idea I'd be billed over $10.00 PER MINUTE! I was told that wasn't the case it is just that the calls are expensive and the rate is only a dollar a minute but with CC fees and tax the charge is high. The man, Todd who was on the other end was actually nice, but obviously he works for a rapist. Eventually he offered me a partial credit of $17 and change. So minus the five the Air Force offered to pay, it still cost us $12.00 and a splitting head ache. I need my own phone.

#2, my GPS & neighbors. If I had my own and we didn't have Indian neighbors I wouldn't have gotten yelled at by the cop and cried.

The Indians, they have ten cars. To be fair, one is a twenty passenger bus and nine are other assorted cars, SUVs, and work trucks. Their driveway holds the bus, a blue tarp covering an entire house worth of furniture and two cars. The rest of the cars get parked in the street. Two of them in front of our house, two at our neighbors and a few sort of jammed in at the end of their driveway sort of in the middle of the street.

On Saturday we had a party for C. So Friday night S scoped out one of the street spaces directly in front of our house so that our guest could use our driveway. I parked in the grass.

Saturday morning we needed to take Maggie over to Doggie day camp. I asked S to bring her. We ended up having this huge fight over it. Here are the highlights:

  • He didn't want to take his car because the neighbors would seize his parking spot
  • He holds the GPS, it wasn't charged
  • He didn't remember where Pet Smart was
  • I yelled directions to him at least three times, I yell, he just stops listening (don't blame him)
  • He takes my car, but my car doesn't have a lighter / charger so he cannot use the GPS
  • If I had my own GPS it would be charged
  • I finally say and not in a nice way, that I could have been to Pet Smart and back by now and get in the car and leave
  • We say we are sorry when I get home

But the story doesn't end there. Oh no. Herndon was having a parade that day and the side street we live off of was blocked to through traffic. It wasn't a problem leaving but coming home was a whole other ball game. I circled our block but there were barriers everywhere.

I went back to the one barrier that had a guard / volunteer and turned left onto the street and stopped to chat with him and see what to do. But instead this Cop gets off his motorcycle and starts yelling at me. Asking me if I can read, saying "can't you read the sign it says no left turn!?" "can't you tell this street is blocked off?" "Can you read, what to do need to say so bad that you can disobey traffic signs?" and the tirade continued for at least a minute which felt like an eternity. I just started to cry and cry hard. Through my sobs I just look at the volunteer and say "I live here, the signs says no through traffic, but I live here." Then the cop gets back on his motorcycle and peels off back towards where I need to go. The volunteer looks at me and asks what street I live on. I tell him and ask if there is a different way to go that I do not know, and he says, "no this is fine. If he gives you any trouble just tell him I said it was okay." then he lets me through.

I go one block up the street and the cop won't let me pass. He is yelling something to me and gets off his bike. Then he moves the barrier and gets back on. We go one more block and he does the same thing. This time I just go around him, still crying and sobbing and by this time I really need a box of Kleenex.

So if the Indians didn't have twenty people living in one house and own ten cars (I don't really know how many people live there, but the ten cars is no exaggeration) and I had my own GPS that was charged S would have taken Maggie and I would have been happily cleaning up the house while he was away. However it didn't work out that way instead I came home all upset and S thankfully was cleaning. Which was really nice. Hug, hug, kiss, kiss we make up and try to forget about the asshole cop. Who by the way, was wrong, the sign didn't say no left turn it said No through traffic, but I wasn't through traffic. Asshole.

#3, a camera. S travels a lot. He takes the camera with him. I cannot sell anything on Ebay or CL without a picture! It drives me crazy. This man is in school full time. He uses the computer day and night and I have free time when he is AWAY! Hello, McFLY!!!! you've been to Denver a billion times I think you captured the beauty a while back.

#4, my own money: I just want my own. I am so tired of scraping and saving just to transfer money from one account to another just to pay bills and cover stupid things like pay phone calls. I need my own money. I feel lost and drowning in a sea of debt and cannot really focus on the big picture of it all. IVF killed our savings and maxed our CC. I don't really know what to do, but I don't want to explain why I chose to go buy a two dollar cup of coffee. Not that S cares or even pays attention. I just feel like I have to have an answer because it is my responsibility to take care of the money.

#5, my own DVR: Everything works great in the off season. However come premiere season life sucks. The DVR can only do two non permanent things at once. We can record one show and watch another or we can record two shows and watch one that is already on the DVR. If you have a recording for more than two shows at the same time the DVR chooses the one last two you put in or the ones you set a priority for. S and I have shows at the same time and my show didn't get recorded this week. I want my own.

#6. my elbow: Yeah it sucks.

#7, my cold: So does my cold.

Monday, October 5, 2009

It is 9:02 PM

Do you know where Peyton and Lucas are?

I keep waiting for the series to say they went to visit Lucas' mom or something with the new baby. How on earth can you have a BABY or allude to it anyway in the finale of season 6 and then pretend like they don't exist in season 7? Did I miss something. OTH is a show about the Peyton Lucas love story is it not? And who are all these new lame characters? Put my favorites back.

I didn't get a memo on this change, nor do I approve.

CW, go F yourself.

The Best Laid Plans

Trying to plan a 6 year old Birthday Party? Don't. Make a cake, hang up dollar store balloons and buy ear plugs. Everyone will have a great time, and you will be able to save some sort of sanity for next years shin dig. LOL. My plans didn't happen. S was able to get the boys all in a line at one point to play T Ball but even that was a stretch. They were happiest running all over the backyard yelling about transforming into that or morphing into that.

I have a great letter to write to certain parents, but I shall hold my tongue for today. For One Tree Hill starts in two minutes. :P)

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Saturday Morning

It is party day. At this point I am looking forward to it. In the end we had 12 RSVPs, so 13 kids including C. They'll be here between One and One-thirty and then we are partying hard until three. Why between one and one-thirty?? Hmm, well that is a strange one. I got this email from a parent I don't know saying she'll drop her kids early. She didn't really ask or say why. And apparently she isn't staying? I suppose Herndon is a whole new ball game. People actually let their kids out of their sight for a few minutes? Oh well, really I don't mind. The boys coming early are some of C's best friends.

Another parent called and said her daughter has health problems but she "isn't one of those parents who keeps their kids locked up at home because they are allergic to everything under the sun." The girl is allergic to peanuts, pets, milk, eggs, and a whole list of other things. Then the mom says, "so I'll drop her off and pick her up at 3:30ish". I thinking "whoa, wait a sec 3:30ish? what does that mean?" What if this girl has an allergic reaction to something? It was strange. Are these parents just walking all over me, or is this just the way it is here?

The party plan.

1:30 - 1:45 kids arrive and color pirate pictures
1:45-2:05 Walk the plank game
2:05-2:20 Pirate toss game
2:20-2:40 pirate, pirate, captain aka - duck duck goose
2:40-3:00 CAKE
3:00-3:15 play with pirate toys
3:15-3:30 Reading the book Pirate Pete

So, well see how the actual schedule goes. I am hoping to play a few games outside, but the weather doesn't look too promising. Sadly I have to mow the back yard. But other than that I just need to pick up our mess from yesterday and bring in the extra chairs from the shed. Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

An Open Letter to Bryer's Ice Cream

I went to bed last night at 7. I was just exhausted. I woke up around 9 and vaguely remember downing some Tylenol and having a half of a Diet Coke. I must have woken up ten times again after that. I was actually relieved when C came in a 6:30. All night I just had wicked nightmares. Can't say I really remember any of them I just know they all had to do with death.

This "illness" I assume was completely brought on by emotional stress. Sob, sob. Yesterday I had a really bad headache. It was massive and I knew I needed more then Tylenol to even take an edge off. Then I realized I couldn't take anything harder because it had been more than 30 days since my last period. Of course I know I am not pregnant. It isn't possible. Still, I have strict instructions from the doctor to not take the medicine unless I know I am not. So I pee on a stick and even though I know there won't be two lines, I am still heartbroken when there isn't. Part of me wishes I just suffered through the headache. Pity, pity, blah, blah, I took two Vicodin and ate ice cream.

And now my open letter to Bryer's:

Dear Bryer's Ice Cream,

You do wonders with chocolate. As an emotional crutch you are top notch.

I'll take ten pounds over crying any day,

I thank you, and my ass thanks you.


I love Ice Cream.