Thursday, April 30, 2009


I must warn any readers - I have just taken two percocets. I could fall asleep at any moment, or just get even sillier than normal. But lots to tell:

  1. There was a male nurse yesterday who wasn't wearing any underwear. I noticed. It was gross. The very robust and slightly feminine man needed a shave and a hair cut. His teeth were sort of yellow so I just looked down, and then HELLO, free balling it to the left in a pair of light blue scrubs.
  2. When getting ready for the surgery I was told to grab a bag of clothes and change then proceed to the waiting room with the other surgery patients. So I grab a bag and tie on the gown. It was sort of tight, but I didn't really think much of it. So then I put on the little socks - S was so excited about those. Next there are a pair of pant and I was thinking "well, I don't need those, considering where they are going for this surgery." So I just put them back in the bag and took out the next article, a robe. I tried to put the robe on but it was way too small. I couldn't even put two arms in at once. So I look at it and realize it is a size XS. Oh, so I look at the gown, it too is a XS. Granted I wear anywhere from a large to an XL depending on the size, so these must have run big in parts if I could get the gown on. So, I sort of shuffle through the changing room door and back over to the cart, holding the gown closed in the back and look for a bag with the right size. I grabbed it and changed out the robe. Then went out to the room where the cart was to sit with S. I look around and there are like fifteen other people waiting in there and they are all wearing the pants! I sit for a few minutes but then figure I better get the pants. Well, I go and grab the bag I left under the counter and pull out a pair - of course they were smalls! So back I go a fourth time into this changing room in front of everyone just to get the sizes right. I was a mess.
  3. The doctor thought I was an idiot, of this I am sure. So, it is finally my turn in the surgery room and they give me the sleepy drugs. I just burst out laughing and can't stop. They strap my legs into these bootie type holders in the famed GYN stirrups and I am hysterical. I can't stop. I am laughing so hard I am crying. I ask the doc "is this normal?" and he says "well, not exactly - most times people just giggle." Well, eventually I fell asleep, but man was I laughing hard.
  4. The nurse who was in phase one recovery said to me "you are my favorite patient this week." But sadly I can't remember just what I was saying - but it must have been good. I have a slight memory about asking for popcorn - but that is all.
  5. The nurse in Phase two recovery said "Ahh, I have heard about you." I just sort of smiled trying to think of something witty - it didn't work. Of this I am so glad because as it turned out she wasn't talking to me. She was talking to some load mouth IVF lady next to me.
  6. The loud mouth: While we were in the waiting room this women was really loud. At one point she was laughing like a hyena - or me in surgery - your pick. Her husband was just a loud. They were really a funny looking couple. The woman, large, black and loud - the man, Small, white, and loud. Anyway - afterwards when we were in the same recovery room my nurse asked me if I wanted cranberry juice or apple juice first. My answer - "cranberry please." and then suddenly loud mouth says "I want the apple juice, hey can you hear me?" and there went my apple juice. Hmmm, big o' loud apple juice stealer she was.

Today I slept all day. I had the following dreams:

  1. I was in my sister's book. I found my dad after the earthquake but he wasn't my dad he was the cross dressing queen in hers - I was freaked out.
  2. I was looking for Edward in Italy - I couldn't find him.
  3. I was in a library trying to borrow a copy of the CD with Shiny Happy People. [i just heard that Michael Stipe worked on an album with somebody recently - maybe that is where that came from]
  4. I was running a 5k and my doctor was yelling "NO, DON'T! Your test was positive"
  5. I was running a 5k and my doctor was yelling "GO Jamie GO!"
  6. S and I stuck in a tornado and yelling for our dog.
  7. I was eating gross food and called my mom to complain - she just told me a story about Home Depot.
  8. I was drinking a coffee and wishing it wasn't laced with roach pee. [woke up screaming there]
  9. Then there was one where I was trying to read a map, but couldn't find true north. Then from there I was looking for my bra in a pile of clean laundry while wishing I could find clean socks too.
  10. I was dreaming that I was dreaming. It was weird, really weird.
  11. I was having sex, lots of it. I couldn't exactly see my husband - but he was there. I am not sure he had a big part - I seemed to be flying pretty solo on my adventure. While "having fun" I was patting around the floor looking for the camera. - GO AHEAD - Make fun now. I know TMI. I had this dream like five times. I just kept thinking when I woke up "doesn't my body know that this is not how I make babies?" LOL

So there you have it. Tonight I feel better after the double dose. S and I are babysitting tonight. Well, S has to do all the hard parts - like getting all the kids to sleep - LOL I can't life the baby, so he's been Mister Mom. Still the big kids had fun. A and C painted - we did a bunch of puzzles, watched Wubbzy and made a pumpkin cake. It was nice for C. After all he has been shuffled between so many babysitters the last few weeks and even today while S and I were both home I was passed out and S had a paper to write. So the poor kid was on his own for entertainment from like noon to five. I am still surprised that he didn't destroy the place or hit the fridge all that much.

One kind of cool note: Last week S and I decided that C was getting a little to influenced by TV. So we opted to unplug his TV from cable. The first day he noticed and told S his TV was broken. We told a parenting lie - "Hmmm, it looks like your cable went out during the storm last night." The next day C asked me if I could fix it. I brushed it off and said maybe tomorrow. He hasn't asked about it yet. In fact, he hasn't even been watching cartoons in the morning lately. Tonight once the kids were winding down I said I would put a show on for them and C was like "I want sponge bob!" and I just said, "you know, A is too young for that, I am going to pick a Noggin show instead." So, Wubbzy it was, and there was no complaining, only a happy kid who got to watch a cartoon. I love when TV works for me!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

I'm Okay

The surgery went well. It only takes like ten minutes, but I of course slept for like ten hours. What can I say - my body loves all medicine. They took 34 really good eggs out. The doctors couldn't believe it. That made me feel really hopeful. If they took out 34 to fertilize, I am bound to have some good quality ones to put back on Saturday.

So, my attempt at sitting up isn't so swell. Lots to tell you my dear readers - like the male nurse who didn't have underwear on this morning - and that I noticed, or like the fact that when I put the hospital get-up on I didn't realize I was suppose to wear the pants too. But as I said, this attempt has been foiled - must. lay. down.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Bulls Eye

Day 10. I took the HCG shot last night. S and I were laughing so hard we could barely get it done. After all, I was bent over the counter in the kitchen and he was saying things like "now where exactly does this go?" and my favorite "Geez, I hope I don't miss." Seriously things weren't so bad. Last time we did IVF we had to go to this injection class and S had to practice. He made the nurse draw bulls-eyes on ass to be sure he got the shot in the right place. For over a week I had circles of black sharpie making googly eyes at me every time I passed the mirror after a shower. No bulls-eye this time - just us cracking up and me, shaking so hard from laughing with tears streaming down my face that he could have indeed "missed". But he didn't and I actually didn't feel a darn thing. Nothing. - how is that for a shot in the ass? LOL - we are so goofy. So - went in for a blood test today and was told to show up for surgery tomorrow. Imagine that - I made it this far.

Also, I am reading my sisters second draft - well probably her millionth draft of Smashing - but it is my second. It is good. We have been so proccupied with IVF that I feel like I am putting her on the back burner. I printed out the last twenty pages or so and am going to read them in the clinic tomorrow. I know she must be super anxious to hear what I think. I loved the first draft, so I am sure there isn't much change there, she is amazing.

At the same time I am reading New Moon. It isn't as good as Twilight - although I managed to read 500 pages in two days. I usually take a month for a book. But I have had so much time on my hands - that I am getting as much in as I can. Also, I cannot really sit up. The last two days I have to either been standing or laying down. After I I have ovaries the size of grapefruits right now (Doctor's words - not mine) So here is my issue with New Moon: I hate that Edward isn't in it until the last 100 pages or so. I cannot stand that Bella is "hearing" his voice when putting herself in danger - PLAHEEESSSE. I am not amused with the werewolf theme. Oddly I bought right into the whole vampire deal - and could suspend my belief in reality for a moment, but wolves - really? Run, Jacob, Run. Morph - you can do it ... Yeah okay - more like "run, Forest, run." Still, I am so hooked and cannot wait until I get the third one.

Also, looking forward to Idol tonight. I think I am going to DVR it and watch my DVR'd Tree Hill tonight and then Idol. After all I can get through an hour of Idol in like 23-25 minutes if I FF through Paula, The new chic, Randy, Secrest, and the commercials. I like Simon - so he is still in.

Monday, April 27, 2009

IVF Day 9 & the Usual

This morning our appointment was good. S and I couldn't believe how many eggs I actually have. 70+. Just under hyper stimulation and in the high normal range. The doctor was really happy about it and kept saying "this is really great". Kim L gave me great advise! Thanks Kim. Stay positive and trust in God - Got it.

So today we went out to lunch and mini-golf. It was a nice time - but so darn hot. I have sunburn on my legs and face. Errr - Joe even asked if we had sunblock and then we forgot anyway. I put some spares in the glove boxes of both cars when we got home. LOL - at least C has started is tan. The kid gets so darn dark. Anyway - last year we went mini golfing one time and got rained on so they gave us a coupon. We had no idea how much it was for or what - but it turned out we didn't have to pay at all. Which was kind of nice since technically we did already pay, but that was in 2008. I am on a roll with that stuff lately.

The boys have T-ball tonight. I am sitting this one out. I have to take the "trigger shot" (HCG) tonight and just want to take it easy. I have one more blood test tomorrow (no porno wand scan deal - YIPPPEEEE) and then on Wednesday it looks like I will have the retrieval surgery. We didn't get this far last time and I am really excited.

Also something kind of silly: Last time we did IVF we went to McDonald's a ton afterwards. You can't eat anything before the tests and we were getting up at five and by the time we were out of there it was eight. So this time around we wanted to avoid all that junk. (Especially since I was so determined to loose ten percent of my weight before the cycle) So, we tried out a dinner we had seen a few time and it turned out to be a little pricey. Then last week we passed this hole in the wall dinner across from Howard University. It isn't a great neighborhood, but I was starving to the point of almost fainting and told S to just stop there and if it looked too bad we could get toast to go. (I was desperate and he wasn't stopping!) So we pull in and the place says something like "Mel's - a great place to eat" we sit down and the place is a complete dive - but there was no one in there so we deemed it pretty safe for the moment. Everything on the walls was faded by the sun and dusty. Some pictures had broken glass and nothing had been updated in the last 15 years at least, fortunately neither had the prices! It was so cheep. We got huge meals and drinks for under ten bucks. We've been going there everyday of our appointments. Today it was crowded and we were totally the only white people around - but who cares - the food was that good. We went to our "usual booth" and ordered our "usual meals". It was tasty - granted we could possible get swine flu or TB from all the dirt in the joint. "Our booth" has Christmas decorations on it! And I don't think the decor was from last Christmas, or the one before that LOL. The newest picture on the wall is from 1994 and I would bet that might be when our reindeer and poinsettia was placed on the shelf.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The New Guy

IVF Day 8 and all is not really well. We had a new doctor today and he seemed worried about my numbers getting to0 high. So much for text book perfect. Although it could just be that he was citing all the possibles, he was hard to read. At one point I just told him he was scaring us because my estrodial was so off last time (that is one of the estrogen levels) then he just sort of said "well, there are other things we can do to get that under control". Really Fuck Head? Because last time they said that - screwed with my medication - and then all my eggs shriveled up and died. Needless to say - I didn't enlighten him on my last thoughts.

On a good note though I have six follicles ready to go today, and by tomorrow I should have about 18, which is way more than they need - six to ten is what they aim for. My body is just extra generous. I heard one couple talking the other day and just wishing that they had four. Then this morning the women was telling another that one of her follicles were too large and pretty much "fell off" so she wasn't sure if they were going to continue or try again next cycle. It is really sad, all these women who have the same problem with different issues. I bet this women would trade places with me in a second.

We went to church after we got home. It wasn't as uplifting as I had hoped. Our priest has been so stuck on the same topic for the last few months. It is getting a little discouraging I need to hear some 'Good NEWS' after all that is what we are celebrating right? And here is the kicker - the whole time I am there all I am doing is thinking "how can I word this prayer so God knows I am ready for IVF to work?" " What can I say to him to convince him?" and other insane ideas like this. Hello - Jamie - doesn't work that way - Yeah - I know - I am just a so worked up with the docs sort of bad news.

Oh well got to pick up C from Sunday School - hopefully the doc doesn't call with bad news. No news is good news.

10 Hours Later:

No news = good news. Just got back from dropping of the kiddo at the sitters and now just hanging out watching the Sox. Elsburry needs a hair cut. Papi needs a HR - his average is terrible this year so far. Pedi got threw out at second and the commentators will not shut up about it. Actually they won't stop talking about any play - and they seem semi retarded. (sorry - so not PC) The Yanks are up now - and I am sure you do not need my play by play. LOL

In other news: I had a really cool day. After I picked C up from Sunday School we went over to Kohl's. It was 93 and he had no bathing suit or shorts. I saved ones from last year hoping we could scam it, but no such luck. The kids grew. LOL. Anyway I just let him go - told him to get five or six shorts and T's and two bathing suits. So he picked out almost all Star Wars shirts and a few shorts. He was really pretty funny, he let me know he was looking for "like things that have dragons on them and cool superhero stuff." For a while I started to feel bad for him because everything he liked was too big. He wears a 6/7 but all those sizes are kind of little kiddish. He wants the skater looking stuff in the big kid section. So I let him get his shirts two sizes too big and he compromised on the shorts. 100.00 later I was checking out and remembered I had a gift card. I swiped it hoping it was more than a few cents (I have a habit of saving gift cards only to find out months later that there is a two cent credit) and there was 45.oo on it! Yipppppppeeeeee.

So, 55.00 later I was finished checking out and C says "Mom, was everything on sale?" and I tell him it was and then he says "Mom did you use a gift card?" and again I tell him yes and then he says "sooooo you like saved some dollars?" Me "Yea" C "So then you have some extra money for a kid bopz happy meal at McDonald's?" He so won that one.

Once we got home we filled up the kiddie pool and made the best of our minuscule backyard. We had a blast. We got the dog to play soccer with us for over an hour. The pool was "center field", we only got Maggie (the dog) to get the ball from there once - but it was stinking funny. We took turns being the goalie and the other person had Maggie on their team. She got a couple of goals. Mommy only got one and Coop = well he got them all. LOL - it was fun. We were out there for about four hours until we just couldn't move anymore.

Friday, April 24, 2009

All That Glitters at IVF Day 6

Day Six and all is well. Today the doctor was really excited to tell me everything looks "text book perfect". I have been teetering on cloud nine all day. I am so relieved that the numbers from all the lab work and scans look good this time around, but still don't want to get our hopes up. The blood work and scan went so well that they cancled my appointment for tomorrow and said "see you on Sunday." Music to my ears.

On a funny note: Now, this I didn't even admit to my husband, although it will most likely come out by the end of the day. I cannot keep a secret when I think it might cause a laugh. Anyway, the doc does the whole trans-vaginal scan with the porno prop and it is really hurting. The other days it didn't hurt, but now that my follicles are getting bigger things are sore. So once it is all over I reach over for the baby wipes (NOT THE LYSOL WIPES) to clean "the area" because all that gel they use is leaking everywhere. (oh, so gross) Anyway Joe always just looks at the floor or those tacky ceiling tiles they put in GYN rooms that have flowers and a well on them - he just tries to avoid the yuckier parts - so that is how he missed this part.

So I wipe, and then have to grab another baby wipe so I put the one I just used right on the edge of the bed thingy and notice it has some reflective qualities, hmmmm I think, and then it hits me. "Oh noooooooooooooo - I took a bath the night before and used bath and body works shimmering lotion - all over." I looked at the second wipe and sure enough it was covered in golden glitter! So then I just sort of smirk and shimmy on my clothes and clean up the table. Some how I accidentaly smeared the table and it was shinning with glitter too. I grabbed the baby wipes trying to clean it up but it wouldn't come off. The paper lining had moved to the side and everything was just reflecting the light. I gave up, threw the sheet they gave me to cover up over it, tossed the wipes in the trash and ask S to unlock the door.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Rise & Shine

I woke up to the best words a girl can here today. "Let mommy sleep - you and I should go do something cool." Oh Daddy - I LOVE YOU!

The boys were out of the house by eight. I slept in until the door shut, then managed to make a pot of coffee and watch over an hour of Rosanne on TV before even slightly moving. Life is good. Later I got a call asking if I wanted to join them at Ihop for a late breakfast. They picked me up and we went into Virginia for a great Brunch.

Now both of them are curled up in the den playing Star Wars. No appointments today - and S is going out tonight with some friends, so he is trying to make my day really easy. It is wonderful. When IVF is over I am going to miss all this special treatment LOL.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The Pink Ones

I had another IVF appointment today. It went great. The doctor and the nurses were confident that my numbers look good this time. Plus I didn't get a phone call to tell me to alter my medications (I got a call every day last time and had to go back in each morning) which means I don't go back until Friday. I am starting to get a little excited but don't want to admit it because obviously if it doesn't work - I'll be so sad. But - I am hopeful and prayerful that it all works out. The best part of the visit - I managed to not embarrass myself if any way shape or form. Although while I was "undressing from the waist down" I notice I was wearing the same panties I wore when I mooned the doc in January. I was kind of laughing to myself when the doc today came in. LOL - I am still laughing.

One funny thing: S recently went into Walter Reed for a sleep study. He carried in his blanky and pillow and slept for a full nine hours with wires attached to him. Anyway - when he came home from this he was all excited because he got a pair of hospital socks issued to him that as he says "are super comfy". Well, today we had a pre-op appointment after the porn prop exam. The nurse was telling me not to bring anything with me, no rings, no jewelry, and wear loose clothing. Then she explained that when I arrive for the egg retrieval I will come to her office and she will give me some hospital pajamas, a robe, and some socks. Just then Scott got a big grin and stuck his thumb up to me. I just started laughing - he looked like such a goof. So then of course I had to explain it to the nurse. She was so funny, after that she kept saying "don't worry, you guys can keep the socks."

It was a very stress free morning. C went to my neighbor T and had a great time. When we were driving home we passed the playground and there was T with her kids and mine all playing and laughing. I jumped out of the car - well S dropped me off I should say - and joined them. T said at least three times - if we need her she is there. It was so nice and kind.

The whole ordeal with A has subsided I suppose. There is really nothing I can do to remedy it and I am okay with that. I have picked it apart and analyzed the heck out it - and there is nothing I can do. My friends flaked out - it happens. They are good friends and one miss hap shouldn't have to wreck that. It worked out just fine in the end. C went to T's and it ended up being only one day after all - that really isn't a big deal. Besides my heart really is with them today as the celebrate M's birthday with out her.

I was afraid I was letting a little depression sink in. I suffer from that once in a while and have been working really hard to stay positive. The blog helps - I didn't realize what a flake I can be. Flake in a good way that is - I can stay pretty positive in the most irrational and stressful situations if I try. Plus my biggest catalyst for being depressed is boredom and certainly I am too busy for that.

Last night we actually did go to the game - it got rained out. We waited the rain out for over two hours but then decided to go after one of the players told us he heard it was going to be more than an hour before they had the field ready - it was totally flooded - and the crew had been working on it for over an hour already - so we called it quits. We read on the Internet yesterday that they ended up postponing the game until today. But you know - we had a good time anyway, C and I brought a blanket so we just wrapped up and tried to keep warm. We started telling silly stories to pass the time. Another little boy who was next to us joined us for a while and we were laughing and having a good time. In one story we made C a prince who could turn people into dust, the problem was they would reform behind him and tickle his neck just a minute later - so we were all tickling the back of his neck and watching him wiggle and squirm - it was cute.

In other news: I think one of my faves: Anoop is going home this week - as well as Lil, which would be welcomed - I don't really care for her, which is funny because during the try outs I told my friend A and I quote "I don't even know why they are having a competition this year - she is the best!" LOL - what a retard.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Saving Grace

Each time we go to the commissary C gets a little treat at the end if he is a good helper and not a complainer. Today in Aisle two we began to have issues. 'Mommy can I have..' 'Mommy I want'. By aisle five I let me know that if he continued to pout when I said 'not this time' than he would not get a special treat at the end. By aisle seven I let him know that this time will we not be getting that treat. I expected the crying - It really doesn't bother me. The screaming gets a little annoying, but I can handle it with out getting stressed or yelling - for the most part.

Today, S came with us. (I am not allowed to lift anything for IVF) He was really getting annoyed with a crying kid. So I spoke with C at his level and explained that we are here to do a job and we need him to stop crying so that we can focus on our work and we need his help. Yeah - that totally didn't work. In the end S offered to take him to the car and the boys left me to finish off the shopping. They had a talk in the car and when I returned with the groceries C apologized to me. I figured things had turned around and was glad at that - but - man was I wrong. The crying and carrying on just started all over again. By the time we got home ( an entire three minutes later) C was sent to his room for a nap. He must have needed it because now he is totally passed out. Poor kid. This wasn't the worst meltdown we've had, but it certainly a loud enough.

Anyway despite the meltdown I still managed to save over thirty dollars with coupons. I had great ones for 1.00 off here and 1.50 off there. I had a great coupon for dog food, dog treats, and dog bones -2.5o off. The checkout guy - was laughing at me and said "you know how to shop." I do, don't I? LOL.

Tonight we are thinking of going to a ball game. It is a double header because yesterdays games were rained out in the area. If the rain holds off today we will head over - should be fun. The boys went to a game the other day but I haven't been to one this year yet.

C starts T-ball this week. It is four days a week - two practices and two games - that seems like a lot. S is the coach. Yesterday their first practice was rained out but the boys had fun with it anyway. They went over to the youth center and picked up all the equipment. C was wicked excited to pick out his number - number 5, because he is 5. He was so proud to try it all on. His team is the Red Sox - so both dad and son are on cloud nine. Too cute.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Friend or Foe & IVF

So, yesterday I was home alone. It was really nice. I had an entire four dollars left from my yard sale so I decided to walk over to Starbucks. We got a brand spanking new one just a few months ago and I managed to be the last person on base to go in there. Anyway my frappachino was wonderful - but I forgot to ask for caffeine free. By the time I was finished with it I had a huge perma-grin and was talking a mile a minute. I was actually kind of amused with my self.

Around two I had a party to go to at D's house a Pampered Chef, which I was looking forward to. That is until I was literally on my way out the door and the phone rang. The party was at 2:00, the D's house is only a two minute walk. It was exactly 2:00 when I left. It was the host - I just rolled my eyes and left. No more I tell ya - I am done with demo parties. It is just ridiculous that I pay full price so the host can get a huge discount and that she really thought because I wasn't there exactly at 2:00, then I wasn't coming. Also, I brought a snack for the party and D didn't even put it out. I could go on, but basically this person never invites me over unless it is for candles, kitchen crap, or random cooking seasonings and appetizers.

I have asked D and her family over for dinner and cards, parties, asked her to walk with me at night, invited her over just to gab and yet all she does is talk about three things - one, her kid being ADHD and needing meds, her PT test (she is active duty), and wanting to leave DC - well I suppose you could add a fourth - demo parties. It is getting a little old. I guess I did go on and on and on. I think I just a little upset at the way some friendships here are going lately. I might be just taking out another situation on D, sigh.

The other situation: I am really upset with a friend, A and I feel like I cannot tell her. I think if a situation was reversed she'd tell me - but I hate conflict. I watch my friends two little ones every Thursday. And as I have blogged before - it doesn't always go swimmingly - but I really do love the children and adore their cute antics. Also, I have learned that if I want them to play well I need to play with them and avoid lazy tendencies. Anyway - a few weeks ago, I watched them for three days. We generally swap babysitting back and forth. A lot of the times we don't even plan it, if we want to go to a movie or out to dinner we just call them up and vice-versa. We all like it that way. But with all that being said - I watch her two more that she watches mine lately - but that is only because they (her and her husband) let C sleep over nine straight day last time we did IVF and jumped at the chance to help us out again this time around. Honestly, overall I couldn't live here with out them.

Well the other day they email us and say they are going on vacation this week. Now there is a hole back story to their VK situation but basically they had a hotel credit that was going to expire and this week was the only week it could be redeemed. They went to Virginia beach. They were suppose to watch C. They had the dates since February, and I am kind of ticked. They apologized and said they felt bad, but they still went. Now there is more to the story than just this.

The 22nd is a hard day for these friends. Two years ago they lost their daughter M. She was still born at 38 weeks. I couldn't imagine the devastation it must have caused. Back then I didn't really know them well. This event brought us close - but that is not much a consolation prize. Even I cannot forget this date. I knew that C was suppose to sleep over on the 21st and I was contemplating asking another friend to help out that day so when she emailed me that they would be away the first part of the week, I just said, it is not a problem, I was concerned about the 22nd and was contemplating asking another friend to help out. A was really surprised I remembered M's Birthday.

That is pretty much it. I understand they have an unpleasant history with the week, one which I cannot fully understand because it has never happened to me. I understand they could not let their vacation trip expire. I also understand that they really are sorry. However, I feel like they let us down. I do a lot of extra for them and feel like I bend over backwards to help them sometimes. I feel slighted. They are only a few hours away - and I bet if it was any other week of the year they would have offered to take C with them. M's birthday must be the hardest day of the year for them - I cannot imagine what it is like - but I am compassionate towards this situation. Obviously I knew it was a bad match of the dates, and could foresee a conflict of interest or I wouldn't have thought to maybe get some different help for that day, but I just wish they had told us that these weeks were not good for them. Because it was so last minute we missed out on an opportunity for help from family and other friends. Because it was so last minute I am ending up with all the stress. Stress which I can literally feel.

We have arranged other care for C this week. My neighbor T is going to watch him and seems overly happy to do so, which is great. Still I fell crappy about the above situation. Now I am analyzing every email and conversation we have had lately - thinking I missed some clues or something. I keep thinking that maybe they knew all along those days wouldn't be good and didn't know how to tell us - and I keep adding up all the days I watched her little ones in comparison to how much she watched mine. It isn't' a fun place to be, I don't want to think negative things about my friends. I like my friends. I am picky about my friends and do not just tell it all to everyone. I am not sure if the hormones from IVF are starting to work their way into my thinking or if I am letting a little depression set in. I would actually be quite embarrassed if A knew any of this. I really wish I wasn't so stuck on the issue - after all on my end it is worked out - theoretically anyway.

Today I slept all day and only woke when my headache got too bad. It could certainly be a stress related issue - but I am not sure I can blame it on the A situation or IVF. Maybe a little of both ey? Overall the A situation really isn't about the daycare - really it ends up being only one or two days (I'll explain that in a sec) it is just that I feel let down and then feel guilty about feeling that way because of their family history with that day. I am sure I will get over it after I pick it apart some more.

IVF: I had a blood draw appointment today. D, the nurse I like best, was there and it was so nice. She said "Hi Jamie" before I even handed her my card. She also was very positive about my cycle this time. She said that she hoped "I don't' have to call you everyday this time." She did last time because my hormones were off and they had to keep adjusting my meds. She asked about C and how school was going - and she never looked at a piece of paper or note - she just remembered and it was really refreshing. Also, it was good not to have a sono today. I don't go back until Wednesday because everything went so good. I am really excited about that for two reasons 1- it is one less porno prop shoved up my whoo-haaa because things are going well and 2 - I don't have to worry about another morning of daycare.

I feel like I have left so much out. I didn't even get to C being the cutest kid ever today. He bought a Darth Vader mask at a yard sale this weekend. Well, I was in my room with a blindfold/sleeping mask thing on because of the headache and I hear the door squeak open. I mumbled "hey, baby what's up" and C says "I came to make you feel better with the force." So, I lift my mask and see that he is dressed up like Darth Vader and has his light saber sward. It was so sweet that I forced myself to get up. It was rough going for an hour or so, but then my headache went down to a dull throb and I was able to make dinner, do the laundry, and the dishes - which makes me happy.

A friend of mine recently posted that she felt when she was doing house chores one day that there was no other place she'd rather be - taking care of her family. It really inspired me - she is right - I love taking care of my family. So we had mac & cheese and ate off paper plates - LOL - hey I was sick after all.

Oh well, I can hear the mice under the stove. Guess that means it is my bed time. - More on that some other time. The exterminator came and said - well lets get them sick, put some poison down and said - see you in a few weeks. Gross!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Oh Crap

I am home alone (it is fantastic!) and I am catching up on all my DVR'd nanny shows. Wouldn't you know, I just saw myself on TV. We are one of the families on Super Nanny! There is only one difference - they had three and we have one. LOL - we are so screwed.

Saturday, April 18, 2009


I had a yard sale today. It went great - perfect weather - a decent amount of customers for such a small base - and my neighbor T was having hers too so we just BS'd while there were no customers - and traded kid toys (ha, ha) Also, I managed to complete the sale, with no flashing, no embarrassing comments, no tripping, no falling, no unzipped fly, and no crazy hole in the crotch of my pants (like last time I had a yard sale!)

So you know - things were good. Also at the end of the sale I was loading all the left overs into my car to donate to Goodwill and this guy kept coming up and shopping and I was really giving stuff away, a box of dishes for a quarter, a lamp for fifty cents - I figured it was less I had to jam into the back of a Jetta. So the guy was wearing a Yankee's T and I had on a Red Sox T, so I say to him - "Now I know you cannot live with out these two Red Sox bats." and to my amazement he was like - "yeah, how much?" And he bought them! That might be the best fifty cents I made all day. Turned someone over from the dark side - I did.

After the sale we went out to lunch and then tonight we got a sitter and S and I went out. We saw Jamie Kennedy at the Drafthouse. It was really good. Although I liked one of the openers better then Kennedy - which surprised me because I really like him - but he seemed high - and really tired - it took him a while to get going. Also, he told a lot of race jokes and sex jokes. It was like an easy mark, no intellect needed. Now, certainly I laughed, and enjoyed myself - after all the guy is hysterical. Normally the sex jokes don't do it for me, but when the comic gets into position to tell the joke you just have to laugh out loud.

IVF update: I started the stimulants yesterday - although I wasn't paying attention and now have to take them at 12: 00 and 12: 00. Errr, midnight - really - what was I doing that was so important? Who knows. You have to take them 12 hours apart and there are all these warnings on the print outs to take them at the exact time. I am going to have to set my alarm at night. Normally I stay up really late but when I have to getup at five for the appointments - midnight seems really late. Oh well, such is life. It is only for ten to fifteen days - I'll manage.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

What a Boob

So I woke up in a better mood today. I stayed up wicked late last night and watch a bunch of kids by the dozen type of shows. It started off with the Duggers of course and then rolled into a bunch of families with multiples thanks to fertility treatments. It was oddly inspirational and comforting. After all it works sometimes right? So anyway - waking up this morning I realized it is my last day to exercise. Once I start the stimulant drugs I cannot do anything but light walking. Yuck.

So anyway I ran a few miles on the treadmill which was fun. I did it last night too. I was absolutely dripping when I was done. I had to open the garage door and let in some of the cool air. I really want to either go to the running track later -or bowling maybe. Sounds kind of funny, but for the next three weeks the doctors have just stressed that I cannot do a darn thing especially since the hormones were off last time. I cannot risk altering any other hormone level having a ripple affect. And then there is the whole deal with all these extra eggs moving all round - they won't be good quality if I am running and bouncing and sweating up a storm.

I start the next round of drugs tomorrow. Currently I am on the suppression drug next comes the stimulants - that is when I am sure I am to be a nut case. However, my friends are right - just relax and be selfish - don't worry about the in-laws or out-laws it isn't about them. Maybe I should record that and play it back to myself a few dozen times.

On a funnier note: I so flashed the neighbors last night. Only me right? Well, true -it could only happen to me. Last night a mouse was driving me crazy munching on dog food. So I worked up the courage to see if I could get it. I took the broom and shoved it under the server I knew he was hiding under. Nothing happened so I moved the server and found a little bit of mouse poop. So I swept up and just as I thought I was done I moved a piece of paper that had flown under there and there he was - brown and beady eyed and frozen in fear. I of course let out a huge scream and the dog ran upstairs ( she is so much help) So I smushed him with the broom. I broke my broom into two pieces and the mouse just kind of hoped sideways - so I smushed him again. (I felt grossed out and empowered at the same time but then before going to bed I heard another one. ERRR) Anyway...

I was wearing my favorite robe. It was tied on the inside and I had the belt loosely tied, well when I smushed the mouse the belt part fell right off. I didn't really care - it was tied under my arm on the inside and the blinds were shut anyway. (my favorite jammies were in the dryer and I was waiting to put them on) So I grabbed a plastic bag and scooped up the dead critter. Then I went to throw him out back, the back door didn't have the blinds drawn and my neighbor behind us was out for a smoke... I lifted my right arm to wave and felt a very cold breeze on my boob. Needless to say the robe had moved a little south and I was flapping in that cold breeze.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Situation

Here is the deal. We haven't told the parents on either side about IVF. S's parents have been hounding us to visit. We looked at the calender and May is going to be crazy too. We wrap up IVF the first week, then second and third weeks S has travel booked to Denver and Vandenberg. I really wanted to go with him to Vandenberg - but it seems this might be the only week his parents can come down that he would actually have some time to see them. (Memorial Day) It sucks. They pile on the guilt and don't even stop to think about our feelings. I am pretty upset over the situation. If IVF works then company would be great - if it doesn't things could go down the crapper really fast.

The thing is you can't just tell them, listen we have been going through a rough time that we do not want to talk about and need a little space, we are happy that you are here and we are glad you are visiting but please give us some understanding. It just isn't fair. We may have to have that conversation and it may have everlasting affects on the relationship. They are so damn fragile. By them, I totally mean L, But D doesn't help.

We didn't tell them so that we would not have to consider their feelings during the events. We didn't tell them so that we could focus on us and not hear words meant for encouragement that actually cut deeper than a knife like "it wasn't meant to be" or "did you try this..." The facts is we have a better chance if we stay as stress free as possible. I really thought if we kept them at a distance we /I could keep that stress at a distance.

Two hour later ...

So, I talked to S about all of this. He did make me feel better. Basically saying his parents are his problem. What ever we need to tell them he said he would take care of it and I don't have to worry. It helped. He is a little bent about keeping it from them. He is an all or nothing type of guy. We either tell everyone or no one. Now, in his defense he said this isn't the case here - but I know he is concerned that his parents will find out that others knew and their feelings will be hurt, and that is quite admirable. None of us really want to hurt those who only want the best for us - even if they generally cause a huge pain in our ass. LOL - so much for sentiment. For the record, I am still not happy about the situation - but such is life. I am scared it won't work and my hormones are really screwy this time around which has me all wacky - for lack of better description.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Rain, Rain

It is raining. We are way over our average this year. I could complain that my rain coat has to be replaced (I melted the zipper on the pocket by placing it too close to the heater at work once and it has a million looking micro tears on the front) but really I am just to lazy to by a new one. I am actually glad for the rain now because that means that the campgrounds won't ban fires half way through the summer and today I am glad for the rain because C is sick.

We haven't had a sick day in a year or more. C just isn't a sicky. He gets colds once in a while but it doesn't slow him down in the slightest. This morning he woke me up just to tell me he was going back to bed. Poor little guy. Now he is laying on the couch and we're watching Scoobie-Doo. Before Scoob we were watching Sesame Street. (We haven't done that in a few years!)

Monday, April 13, 2009

IVF Part One

Maybe this should be part two / or maybe Part One Round Two. Whatever the title, We started again this week. And for any new readers - I warn you - if you continue reading you most likely at some point will laugh hysterically because I am sure to do something that is ridiculously insane in the next two weeks and then at some point you would likely make a face and yell out "oh that is gross." because at I will be sure to offer too much information.

So part one today was fine. This time around the big honkin' probe didn't seem like a porno prop. Although the newer Doc caught me off guard by asking "how was your weekend?" Actually the conversation was more like this:

"Number 5, follow me." {when you get there you just take a number similar to the deli counter}

"Here for a Sono?"

"Yeah, it is our baseline appointment." We enter an exam room - and the doc prepares the porno prop.

"So, just undress from the waist down and have a seat."

"Oh sure, it is our second round - I know the drill." Then I oh so eloquently explained that I was still on my period. Which is so weird. First, I had no idea what to say and was actually worried about it - Of course it is normal, I mean they plan out what dates you will be ovulating by giving you meds so of course they know exactly when you will be. But I just kept wondering do I say, I am menstruating, I'm bleeding, I have my period still, I am on my period? - I was a freaking mess. (TMI TO FOLLOW)Not to mention that on Friday I actually called my nurse because it was black.

What you ask? Ummm yeah - my period - it was black - no red, no brown, no flowing tablespoons of blood you hear about in health class. Black gross globs. I almost went to an emergency room. I kept making deals with myself that if the nurse didn't call back in an hour, I would call the IVF emergency line. When the nurse called back, she was just like "oh, that happens, it is just an old uterine wall and the eggs from last cycle." OH SO GROSS! Anyway I was still crazy over it and was never so happy to see red blood this morning before my appointment - at least that could be normal. So back to the appointment...

So, after my awkward explanation the doc was like "Oh - that is totally normal, so how was your weekend?" and I so eloquently was like "ahhh, yeah good I guess."

"I went to a friends, it was a great Easter."

Oh shit - that's right - it was Easter. Sorry Jesus - dropped the ball there.

Then doc leaves and S was like - hey do you want me to wait out in the hall for a few minutes. And me - who is so not shy - did not hesitate a big YES. So strange, and out of character - I am still not sure why I would do that. Errr, I make stories so long. Okay - so S goes in the hall, I take off my jeans and underwear and decide I should wipe "the area" clean before the doc comes in, and I look for the standard baby wipes in the room - but instead grab the Lysol / Clorox wipes. - OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

I suppose it was better than the time I mooned the other doc. And it wasn't as bad as when I sneezed during an exam and thought I had peed on the porno prop. (I don't think I wrote about that one - there has to be some privacy right? LOL ) Plus no one had to know about this one. Sometimes I am such a moron - So I disinfected my who-ha and stumbled over what I did for a major holiday - not just a major holiday - like the most major one. Oye-Ve, I really am a mess.

Next appointment is Next Monday. Unless they call sooner - which happened last time. And as an after thought - the appointment actually went just fine. The new doc is really nice, and she didn't feel the need to relentlessly stab me with the honking probe, she was quick. Hopefully we get her again, but I am sure we will end up with the interns by the second appointment.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

AAFEE's I Love You!

To Whom it May Concern,

On Saturday, April 11th, I had the pleasure to shop in your Bolling Air Force Base location. After walking around your store which was a balmy 85 degrees I found several items that I wished to purchase.

The first item was located in a bin that read "foam ball 2.99", because the bin contained a plethora of foam balls I decided to double check the price at a scanner. The actual price for the foam ball was 6.99. When I returned to the bin, I read each label, looking for the correct one to put the item back into. There was not one bin marked 6.99. I put the item back where I found it.
After this I proceeded to the check out counter. Three registers were operating and the lines were two to three people deep. I opted to stand in line at register six. As I was waiting the line grew larger, and upon inspection there were seven people in line six. An AAFEE's employee tapped the women behind me on the shoulder and said "I can help you at customer service." Then her line filled up to five people deep.

Next register five opened. The cashier announced "I can help the next in line." But when I stepped a little to the left the people behind me scooted up and before I could blink line five had more customers than line six. I continued to wait in line six.

Line six was entertaining at best. The gentlemen in front of me had an entire cart filled with clothing and accessories. He would only give the employee one item at a time. Once the employee rang in the item, removed the hanger, and folded the clothing perfectly the customer would ask for a total. Once seeing the total he would then decide weather to keep the item or ask the cashier to remove the item from the bag. A few times he made a phone call asking the recipient if they really want the item he was purchasing. If the item needed to be removed the employee would unfold the clothing, find the hanger, and rehang the clothing. He would then leave his register, walk over to a cart next to customer service and hang the clothing on the cross push bar. This back and forth motion went on for twelve minutes since I had stepped in line. I cannot be certain how long this transaction had been going on prior to my arrival.

On minute thirteen the customer began to find his money. His total bill came to one hundred and sixty five dollars. The man gave the cashier one 160.00. Then he began to ask the price of certain items he began pulling out of the bags. He asked that a few be removed, and the dance started all over again, unfold, fold, hanger, no hanger, over to shopping cart at customer service, and back again. By now the lines were down in line five and I stepped left. But my stride was interrupted with a "Sorry, I am closed."

So there I stand in line six. Seventeen minutes passed with me as the second person in line before I was called to the front. My transaction was quick, one bag of Easter candy and a plastic egg filled with bunnies for a grand total of $3.36. Obviously the purchase was 100% necessity or I would have stomped out at after five minutes of watching our slow shopper and methodical checker. Certainly I cannot fault you, the BX, for a slow check out where blame lays at least partly on the shopper - No, really I can. It is all your fault.

First, you could price all items. Second you could price all discount items and make sure each item scans at the new price. Third you could demand that your workers do their best to check out customers in a timely manner. Really - each item the customer rejected was individually put back on the return cart - really? Could we have just done that at the end? and Fourth, you could have let me, the second person in line, go first in line 5 or at customer service.

Now certainly I understand that store was busy. I understand that 85 degrees might be comfortable for those who were born closer to the equator and I certainly understand that shoppers are picky. However, what I certainly do understand is that the Bolling BX held up the base mantra "mediocrity at it's best" and I would like to take this opportunity to thank you.

Thank you for wasting my time. Thank you for helping me loose two pounds as I sweated out a seventeen minute wait in line six. And most of all, thanks for the bunnies with jagged edges I left in my child's Easter Basket this morning. I am sure you can understand why I will not be back.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Elbows all Around

Something funny to start: Last night we wanted to go out to dinner. We decided on brick oven pizza. It was Friday during Lent so we didn't want to eat meat, which lead us to a more expensive pizza choice at the Macaroni Grill. So we arrive and C and S go to wash hands. Since we knew what we wanted I didn't even look at the menu. I told the waitress we wanted a large cheese pizza. She looked at me really weird, but then smiled and said "I'll bring you the bread". When the boys got back C pulled out a deck of cards he had smuggled in, so we all started playing go fish.

The bread came, our drinks came, and the cards were getting matched up. We were having a really nice time and then another waiter brought over a small pizza about the size of a large dinner plate. We just kind of looked at each other and smiled and the waiter just kind of stared at us, as if to say - "didn't you order anything else?" So I just piped up with "would you mind bringing us some plates and more bread?"

So we finish our game, divide up the pizza, and laugh as we enjoy a second loaf of their bread. We also joke that we are going to McDonald's for ice cream later. Then the bill comes. A whopping twelve bucks and my soda was 2.75! LOL - I accidentally ordered the personal pizza for all three of us. No wonder the waitress at the start and the delivery guy waiter were giving me weird looks. I checked back on their menu and it clearly said serves one.

Only me right? Well the fun didn't stop there, it continued today. In the pouring rain we took C to a "fan-fest" at the Maryland Blue Crabs. (an independent baseball team we like) They were suppose to have seven bounce houses, free food, an Easter Egg hunt and a bunch of other things. We knew it was pouring, but we figured their website would have said if it was totally canceled, and it didn't. So we headed over. The team modified the events to fit under the overhangs of the snack bars, so seven bounce houses turned into two and the free food turned out to be only ice cream - I haven't had ice cream in ages because I have been dieting - yet I had it three times this week LOL - I almost made it to Easter! Anyway, C had a blast. He loved this one bounce house that was a maze.

The maze was crowded for a while and the bigger kids were really being rude. One of them even jumped on C, not exactly on purpose but he wasn't being very observant either. Another time a really big kid (way too much Xbox and Oreos) was sitting on top of this wall the kids had to use a rope to get over. The Xbox kid was totally blocking the way. C yelled out "hey kid, excuse us we want to go through." Another kid yelled over "MOVE" C waited a few seconds and then just went for it. He climbed the wall and oh so gently elbowed the kid in the ass. The kid tumbled down the wall and C just starting laughing. I pretended not to notice. - hey my kid has to win a fight on his own once in a while.

We actually had a blast watching him navigate through the maze. We didn't hang around for the egg hunt, in the end it was just raining too hard and we were antsy to do something else. So we went to the Mall and walked around for awhile and then headed out to lunch. It was a great day. When we got home we watched the Sox on Fox - it is nice to be able to see a few games here and there. They won and now the boys are celebrating by playing Star Wars in the Den.

Well, the Easter Bunny is calling. Gotta dig out the basket and fill it up. Hmmm, now that I think about it I better iron something for tomorrow. - such the procrastinator.

Really I have a lot more to babble about - for example the IVF is not going well. I am really sick from the drugs this time. Also, I must write an open letter to the BX concerning my last shopping experience there. But ... Sometimes life is more fun when you just focus on the good stuff.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Knock, Knock

My son is the sweetest five year old in the world. This morning he comes down stairs all groggy and sleep-ish, he pulls a chair up to the fireplace, turns on the flames, gets a blanket and settles into the chair. He turns back to look at me and says, "oh good morning beautiful mommy." So, I say "good morning handsome C." Then he yawns an over exaggerated yawn and asks about the pirates on the news.

Side note: A lot of parents I know don't let their kids watch the news. And really I am surprised that I do. However, C takes a real interest to it and likes to follow the stories through the week. So this morning, he hadn't seen the update on the Somalian pirates, he was actually asking if anything happened overnight. Anyway, I told him that the captain tried to escape but he was not successful. C wanted to see for himself, so we watched the news for a while longer. It doesn't stress him out, like it does some children, although I watch for signs of that. Generally he is just really interested in what is going on around the world.

So, once the news grew old for him, C asked me to pause it. (the glory of DVR) I did, expecting him to ask for breakfast. Instead he said he wanted to tell jokes. Oh boy - here we go, I thought, and sure enough the knock knock jokes started. But today they were the best jokes in the world.

Knock, Knock
Whose there?
Love Who?
Mommy, I love you.

Knock, Knock
Whose there?
Wonderful Who?
Wonderful Mommy

Knock, Knock
Whose there?
Pretty who?
Mommy is the prettiest girl in the world!

Knock, Knock
Whose there?
Power Ranger
Power Ranger Who?
I am the blue ranger and you are the pink .... Hey he is only five.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Like Flies to S**T I Tell Ya!

I attract them, that is all I should say - but I have so much more to tell.

Tonight after dinner we took C and Maggs over to the playground. After awhile the park got crowded so S took the pup for a short walk and then planned on bringing her home and joining us back at the park. To set the scene, we were the only parents there and about 10 kids. One of which is annoying, I mean she, N, is okay it is just that she is vying for grown-up attention and I don't really want to give it. Anyway then along comes a lady with her child and her parents who are visiting from out of town. So I start up a conversation.

At first it seemed nice I asked the grandparents where they were visiting from and started chatting with the mother about the kids at the playground, because she too noticed that there weren't enough parents around. Then the lady starts slamming home schoolers. It started off more or less as saying that the playgrounds are becoming messy and destructive because parents are letting their teens loose. Now that part - I tend to agree with. However, it has nothing to do with homeschooling. Next she begins to bash the way people who home school complain that they can't afford private school, but she and her husband have managed their money well so the can afford the 500.00 a month price tag.

This whole time I wanted to jump in and say "wait a minute" but the women just went on and on with out taking a breath. Eventually I explained that we home school and we have a lot more reasons than just money. Errr I was mad, but at least I wasn't talking to N, the lonely twelve year old. Next the women goes into a speech about her kid's school being the best and on and on about the wonderful teachers, bus drivers, lunch ladies, and everyone else who may roam the halls over there. Now by this time S has come back and hears her talking about a great school. His ears perk up and he starts asking questions - and all I could think was "NOOOOOOOO, Make her stop!"

Then, here is the best part - which is just too ironic. The women says, well at least you think your son is going to "S" elementary. And N pops in with "oh that is where I go, there are tons of kids from base there." So now, there I was asking the 12 year old where she gets the bus, when she gets home, how many little kids there are, what is her favorite teacher and so on. And now N is beaming with an "I am important look", which turned out to be great. It got the know it all lady to look at her watch and realize it was time to leave. I realized N really is a good kid, just a little bored and truly sweet, and S pretty much missed the whole home school bash aspect so he was happy the whole time. More importantly C was thrilled - we were there over and hour and played until the last kid left. Then we went for a great family walk and let him stop at every playground for at least two turns down the slide on the way. Which was all rewarded with some ice cream when we came home.

No sweets has been going great by the way. But tonight those cones were ahhh calling!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


S and I had free passes to a theater in town - so last night we decided to finally use them to see the movie Knowing. It was so worth it. I loved the suspense and the scary parts. Although I thought I had the ending all figured out and it was no where near what I was thinking. So just to let you know, they do not go back in time, and Caleb doesn't sleep over a friends or play soccer, the wife remains dead, and the letter does not go to another kid. I can only say this because this is the way I was sure it was going to end and it of course did not. My ending is better in case you were wondering.

And something funny. Midway through the movie and my extra large soda I had to use the restroom. So I jog out of the theater and down the hall - and into the men's room.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009


Our finances are not budgeted at all. How can they be when we owe so much money to everyone? Last year I attempted to put all the debts in a list and pay down the smallest first and move up the line. I was quite successful until my job ended. Still, things were looking better. Then we decided to try IVF. We charged it. So now, we get paid, I go to the store, fill up my car, leave 300.00 in the account for S for gas and maybe a night out to dinner, and the rest just goes to bills.

I don't know how my friends with house payments do it. Making a mortgage would stress me to the nines. - however randomly I am okay with paying rent. In fact, yesterday when filling out the USAA paperwork, I looked up S's paycheck to get exact numbers and learned that our BAH went up by 300.00, which means we can totally afford a real house, not a town house when and if we ever move. But, if we do find something cheaper, we can use the extra money to put towards the bills. Things seems a little brighter in the finance department - lets hope that clarity spills over into other things.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Twenty Five Things?

I was up late last night with sickness. I am not sure if it was the IVF medication or a touch of food poisoning, but regardless I was up at two and didn't go back to bed until just before five. Oddly I wasn't all that upset over it. It was just inconvenient. Inconvenient and yet a little educational. Did you know that there is a lot of interesting programs on in the middle of the night? Apparently you can now teach a nine month old baby to read, cleanse your colon with a pill or small fruit drink (or they could just take IVF meds or get food poisoning LOL) and drop eighty pound in just a few short months with the latest twisty, turney, hiking machine. Fortunately there were actual shows on cable. Did you know I love old sitcoms? I do, Bewitch, The Beverly Hillbillies, I dream of Jeanie, Hazel, Gidget, and a bunch of other top my list for middle of the night TV watching. Anyway this got me thinking - I am a little quirky sometimes, so here are some things the public should know about it - It figure it makes me much more endearing (ha, ha)

1. I always miss spell the word "because" when I type.
2. When I write I skip the H in the word the.
3. I love hot chocolate.
4. I have really good balance, yet seems to twist my ankles on a regular basis.
5. I am scared of mice.
6. I like when my friends are friends.
7. I skip scenic descriptions and body descriptions when I read.
8. I read a lot of trashy romance novels. There is no need to focus on how big the love interest package is or how the main character is a stunning model type but doesn't know it. Also, I don't care what there mountain range looks like - I have seem plenty.
9. I love rainy days when we have nothing to do.
10. I am a scrabble fanatic. I buy a new scrabble dictionary every few years so I can use the updated words like Qi, Xu, and Qabala when I play against my mother.
11. My mother and sister both cheat at games. My sister is just plain hilarious about it, my mother gets defensive. I don't cheat.
12. I rock at games. Except trivia - my sister got extra genes from that end of the pool.
13. I enjoy teen romance and angst type movies.
14. I cannot "break wind" or "cut the cheese" in front of my son. Once at the mall he starting yelling "Mommy you farted, you did I heard it, it smelled too! Gross - MOMMY FARTED EVERY BODY!" My mother was with us, she quickly walked ahead and pretended not to know us.
15. I love summer, but, I do not like the smell of farts or the crap plant down the street in summer. Something about that warm muggy air just makes it worse.
16. Well come to think of it, I don't like the smell of those things ever LOL.
17. Fart jokes make me laugh.
18. My son make me laugh everyday.
19. I love to watch minor league baseball while eating a giant pretzel.
20. I like to idea of being at stay at home mom, but realistically it is a lot harder than working full time. Although I do like that I get actual time to myself once in a while.
21. I would like to have five or six children. Maybe less maybe more.
22. I think my husband is a good father.
23. I keep my politics to myself. I do not have the same views as most of my friends and my family.
24. I check my email a lot, especially since I fixed the lap top. I am thinking I better put this thing upstairs.
25. I like when everyone gets along, especially family. I love Sunday family dinners at my mom's when ever I go home. I love that we don't all fit around the table but we just keep squeezing in. I love that we never make enough pasta and have to start a second batch. I love that my cousins are boisterous and excited. I love that family friends stop by and don't have to knock. I miss it, especially on Sunday nights.

Sunday, April 5, 2009


Man I had a good day. First it is Palm Sunday - so church was awesome. Every Palm Sunday they read the Crucifixion - the whole way through in a play format and hand out palms. C was actually really good, and I heard almost every word!

Next we came home, S finished packing for his trip and wrapping up some loose ends around the house. Then we had time to go to Olive Garden before he left for Denver. The meal was really good. When it was over we drove S to the airport. It was an easy drive home, no traffic! We even had time to stop at the running track for a good mile.

I got home to a ringing phone, it was one of my best friends, J. Her kids and my one kid actually let us talk in relative peace. LOL. It was really nice. I miss her and it felt good to talk. Later I am going to try again, to call my friend D in California - maybe I can catch up with two in one day :P)

After I got off the phone I took C to ride his new bike. He is getting the hang of no training wheels, but we didn't get very far because the park had at least a dozen kids there. I couldn't say no. We ended up staying over an hour. I had a great time talking with the other moms and C loved hanging out with boys his own age.

Once that was over we went home and took the pup out for a walk. Now an hour later, C is watching Transformers and eating pudding for dinner. (grade A parenting skills there ha, ha) And I am surfing the net with my feet up. Later I am going to relax have some hot coco and read my book.

I am reading Twilight. So obviously I am so far the rest of the living population, but man the book is good. I haven't picked up another book all week. My friend A can't wait until I finish it so we can talk about it. LOL - she is a riot. Luckily it is her book - and she has the next one just waiting for me.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Pretty In Pink

One of the best parts about living in DC is the Cherry Blossom Festival. Every year hundreds of trees bloom wonderful pink and white blossoms around the tidal basin and the monuments downtown. The pictures are really breath taking, I will have to load some onto my F/B account. This year we invited some friends to join us for the big parade, a walk around the monuments, and dinner. It was really a nice time. Plenty to complain about because, well lets face it that is what I do best, but all in all it was a great day. Here are the high points:

The beauty, 65 degrees and sunny, a happy kids, time with friends, plenty to make us laugh, a parade ( I love parades), Alex Trebek was the grand Marshall, we got to eat at a cool restaurant I haven't been to in three years, the subway was fast today and we didn't even go the wrong way - not even once, we got some great pictures, C had someone to play with all day, We all played the Seinfeld Scene It game, dinner was really tasty, and now everyone is gone, and I have time to reflect.

Reflecting on the crappy parts: it was too windy to walk around the entire basin, at the parade a rude family cut in front of us and the people we met while waiting for the parade, our camera kept crapping out, the restaurant we went to for lunch had a 45 minute wait then when we were seated the waitress told us any food, even salads would take another 45 minutes to an hour - it took an hour and a half, I had a killer headache, I forgot sunscreen - not in the swing of that yet this year, we all have red noses, I ate a little too much dinner, and we all skipped desert which I stayed up late last night to make, I burnt my fingers by touching a pot that was over the flame of the stove - I thought it wasn't hot ???? And to top it all off - I have no intention of doing the dinner dishes tonight.

LOL - man I can see the glass half empty on anything. However I am actually quite proud of myself. I didn't complain when we were out with our friends. S and I got a long really well, which is a change from the snippy comments we have been swapping lately, and we all seemed to have fun overall.

If we don't have orders next year ( we are suppose to in February , unless we get an extension we have been trying for) that I will certainly be back. I even know a great viewing place for the parade where hoochie mama's can't jump in front of us (heee heeee).

So, in other news, I am not all that ticked anymore. I have been praying on it a ton, and this morning I just woke up chipper. I am not sure how I feel about the situation, I just have more of a peace about it. I'll have to mull it over and report back on that and the whole "I have clarity" issue. I still have it, it just seems to be evolving at a faster pace than I expected.

Next, I have been doing to IVF deal for a week now. This time around I feel like I have the flu. I have been getting wicked headaches, and congestion, and I am extremely tired. On Monday I stop the Birth Control, so I will probably be a moody mess. Then next Monday I start the everyday thing for 10 days. I have a dilemma there involving one of my favorite cousins, C. She may or may not come to visit during the ten days. Last week I talked with her a little, but the moment felt off to try to tell her about it. Which, I feel bad about - because she really is like a sister to me and my sister knows, so C should too. I don't know - I'm babbling.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Something Old, Something New,Something Borrowed?

Just for the record, I am still ticked at him. Yesterday I touched on the subject, trying to be honest - but it came out as me being a bitch. I wanted to approach the subject later, but lost my nerve. I don't want to fight, I don't want to compromise, I just want to sleep well without all the stress. I want to go to bed and know I have nothing horrible pressing on my mind. It's not that we aren't moving, it is that we are waiting, still. As always just waiting for the next puzzle piece. He'd hate that description, poor guy, I must be impossible. Okay okay, there must be something more cheery!

In other news. I have reconnected with an old friend, R. What is funny is that she really wasn't my friend, she was S's growing up. She married a family friend's son and then through the years we've gotten to know each other a little. But really, not all that much, until recently. She emailed me, and we've been corresponding over F/B for a few weeks. What is funny is that I totally feel connected to her. I want to hear more about her sons, her struggles, her good times. It seems she is in a similar boat as to me and some of my friends, we've all been married a decade or so, and facing waters we haven't learned to navigate yet. Add some children, in-laws, our parents, Catholic Guilt, Christian stumbling blocks, and a lot of love for our families and we'd all make one great Hallmark Channel drama.

And now something funny:

A conversation with C this morning.

C "Mom, I am going to interview you for my news report."

Me "Great, what do you want to know?"

C "Well, uhh what is your favorite part about Maggie?" (Maggie is the dog)

Me "I like her happy faces."

C "Hmmm, well good. Now what is your favorite body part of Maggie?"

Me " I like her tail when she wags it."

C "yeah but sometimes she gets poop on it."

Me "No she doesn't."

C "Yeah she does because she smells like it sometimes and I think she thinks her tail is like toilet paper and she wipes her butt with her tail and then she licks it and then...."

Me "Alright that is enough, what is your next question?"

C"Okay, what is your favorite body part?"

Me "hmmm, my legs because they take me places."

C"And which legs do you like best?"

Me "What?"

C "Do you like your new legs better or your old more fatter ones?"

Me " Can I hear your news report now?"

C "You can check it out on C*****.com, can I have a snack now?"

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Ellsbruy & The Scoop

Ellsbury is on my calender this month. In the game, he is no Little Peddie, but he is better to look at. Maybe April won't be so bad. Although I am still ticked. Luckily for my loyal readers I have so much more to complain about.

1. I watched Biggest Looser this week, and was confused as to why Nicole got voted off. She had immunity - I even reviewed the tape. During the challenge they said she had immunity and if she one she could give someone else a penalty pound. Is there anyone who could clear this up for me?

2. Megan was finally voted off Idol. Oh thank the lord. Me - not a fan. Anoop though - dude what's up, you in the bottom 3? Buck up man and get your game on. My faves are the red head, Chris, Matt and Anoop. And I like Anoop the best - he has a rockin' name. But I think Chris is better - so well see as the weeks go by. Also - Lady GaGa scared the crap about me. I seriously had a nightmare over her darn zipper eye.

3. I've got kids again today. Three days in a row. Surprisingly it is going famously, I am just tired.

4. I got Sox tickets for one game here in June. There was this whole lotto deal to buy tickets, they said if you won you'd have the opportunity to buy tickets to each game. Well, that didn't happen. I was only able to get three tickets to one game. Luckily our friends were able to get them for another night. They are in town three nights - I don't want to miss the other game so I think I will start looking on Ebay or Stubhub. Really I am not surprised at this franchise's poor attempts to gorge money from its patrons. Well, screw them, I am sneaking my own diet coke into the game so there! Ha!

5. Tree Hill blew this week. My TV obsession is getting out of control, in case you were wondering. First, the whole Payton pregnant thing is just overdone, lets have her give birth in an elevator why don't we. Also, the previews point to a tragedy there - but you can never tell what's a dream and what's real on previews. Then there is the whole Brooke / Julian deal. PLAHEEESSSEEE. Get on the plan and get off the show already, bring Brooke back, loose Sam. After all 90210 did the same story, basically with Harley all those years ago. And Haley Ms. Teacher of the year, whose students raid her home to be taught. REALLY? And a five year old longing to know a relative who died before they were born - NO - Not going to happen. Next the show will be on yet another hiatus for a few weeks - WTF, I need my fix. Complaints and all TV is mt drug of choice.

I seriously could keep going - Secret Life was last week, and that sucked too. But I must go. Sigh, this is kinda fun.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

I Fixed It

The Laptop that is. Joe is still on my list, as I am still ticked. But at the moment I am celebrating. So what was wrong with the darn thing? Well, I really don't know., but for the last month I have not moved it from the corner by the chair and only open outlet in the living room. I tired a few times to reload windows, and change the network IP, but nothing seemed to help. Then today Joe, did something else to tick me off. Granted I kind of understand, but still it irked me. C was being a pain before dinner so S just told him "No TV tonight." Which is fine and all, but it isn't like he has to deal with it. He is upstairs doing homework. Anyway, C actually is/was fine. I told him he could play with a bunch of toys we don't normally take out and he was fine with that. Now he is running in circles with the radio on, sadly he is pretty enamored with Akon, and Kanyea West. I probably just butchered those names. Anyway, since S was on the computer upstairs, and I couldn't turn on the TV either, I thought I would try the computer again. And low and behold, we have new neighbors or at least a neighbor that has an unsecured network. The whole deal maybe our router and apparently our direct neighbors unsecured router that we use when ours acts like crap. So Wilson Family Computer - thank you!

It Continues...

I am still ticked.

Yesterday I started the fertility treatment again. Just Lupron, and it already had an affect on me. Killer headache and cramps. So not fair. Joe of course has no compassion and if you ask him he'd just say "I didn't know". Can't he read my mind by now?