Sunday, September 12, 2010

Life, On Hold or LIfe, Moving On?

I heard the sad news on Friday night. My Grandfather has passed away. The wake is Monday and funeral Tuesday in New Jersey. No one seems to be heaving crying with no reprieve were all just sad. He was very ill and in care of hospice, and you cannot have hospice care (24 hour nurses & no cures, just pain management) unless you have a prognosis of less than seven month to live. So as a whole I think the family (certainly me) feels sadness and a sense relief for him.

Which is why life just kept going. We heard the news when we were on the way to the movies and when we pulled into the parking lot S asked "Should we be having fun?" I said something about us not going to a party, it is just a movie, and we went in. We watched Salt, which I really liked. My mind wondered back to my grandfather quite a bit, but only to happy memories. The movie stopped a few times during the show, the theater was having technical difficulties. In the end we had about 30 minutes of "breaks" which equated to two free movie tickets on the way out.

On Saturday we had a yard sale. We'd had one last month and still had some left over items. Plus on Friday afternoon before I picked S up from the airport I cleaned out the laundry room. We're getting our cable re-wired and were asked to empty the closet down there. After I pulled out boxes and boxes of junk (that we never unpacked the last time we moved!) I was determined not to shove it back into the storage closet, so I stuck it in the living room and asked S if he minded if we had the sale. We sold a ton of stuff, including our sofa and some old chairs that were in our shed. We filled our yard and driveway and when it was all said in done we headed over to the goodwill to donate our leftovers. The 'leftovers' all fit in the back of S's SUV. We had so little left. In fact we set up for 8:00 and didn't even have a slow moment until after 2:00.

Today Cooper and I are just going to hang out and relax. It is drizzling a little bit and it should make for an easy day for us, but S will still have Wiffle Ball league this afternoon. I may head out to the mall to try to find an outfit to wear to the funeral. Nothing I have seems appropriate. But at the same time, black is black; and I have plenty of that.

Tomorrow after S gets home from work I think I will be heading to Jersey. My little guy and hubby are going to stay here in VA. It took us a few hours to figure out that detail but we think that is what is best for our family. We just feel that C is too young, bottom line. There are tons of factors we could fret over, like is it okay that S won't be there, and what if we leave C with the Neighbors, Could S take a later flight to Denver or fly out of NJ if we needed, but in the end the bottom line is that C is too young. S had a real fondness for my grandfather and over the winter when we all swarmed the Garden State because we thought grandpa would make it through the weekend he was there, he was there when Grandpa could still remember, still talk, still smile. So S is going to call his boss today and see if he can shorten his hours over the next few days and make sure they book his flight to Denver for Thursday not sooner so that he can keep care of C and I can go represent our little family, saying goodbye to Grandpa.


Kim said...

So sorry to hear that your grandpa passed. prayers w/ you & your family. HAve a safe trip

Jamie said...

Awww man, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa, J! You've been on my mind the past few days a LOT more than normal and now I know why! Love & prayers!!!