Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Honesty - Really - Shut Up

There really is no such thing as true honesty is there? Point in case:

Case One, a phone call from a family member:

"Hey J how are you?"

My Answer: "Oh pretty good - you?"

The Truth: "Friggin terrible, but what do you care? Because if I tell you the truth you will cut the call short and say something stupid"

Case Two, self explanatory

"Mom Can I have candy?"

My Answer: "No, if you have too much candy it will rot your teeth."

The truth: We skipped teeth brushing the other night which I am sure is worse than a piece of heart candy the in-laws sent in the mail, and quite frankly I am just to damn lazy to get up and get it off the top shelf.

Case Three, strangers

"Oh your dog is so cute."

My Response "Oh thanks, we sure like her."

The truth: YES SHE IS YOU DUMB F thanks for pointing out the obvious, now if you don't mind I am in the middle of my walk and would like to make it back home in time to watch my shows.

The truth of the truth: The shows are DVR'd

1 comment:

Jamie said...

somebody in your family said that? unreal!