Monday, January 10, 2011

Closer or More Lost

I slept hard last night. Cold medicine and Tylenol PM served me well while offering me a zillion realer than life dreams. The last one, a nightmare only because it ended. I was at the doctors office and the doctor was showing me ultrasound pictures, my pictures and it was twins. 
No doubt IVF is on the brain hard core. No doubt I was slightly if not fully on edge because I received toddler formula samples in the mail on Friday for a baby that never was. No doubt I  am prone to all kinds of crazy dreams anyway - but geesh. Why are things so hard again? For a while they seemed so much better, and then poof it is back in full swing. 

Here are the problems: We most likely will not be in the January cycle, thyroid and S are both problems. S is too busy. In fact off to Tucson today. (great place to be this week huh?) In the mean time - it all messes with my head. Steadfast and true, I'm trying.

1 comment:

Jamie said...

I hate nightmares, especially of the baby kind when you want nothing more than that.

The whole thing comes and goes in week you may be fine, the next it just hits so hard...and it stinks to get those stupid samples in the mail! I hate that! I've been having a bit of difficulty with it all lately too. Hugs, friend!!! Love you!