Saturday, March 27, 2010

Should I Feel Annoyed?

I am pissed. As usual it is at S's family. The newest issue actaully kept me up last night.

Yesterday his mom called to plan out Easter. I told her my family would love it if they came, she declined, always does. Then I told her that my mom & dad haven't made exact time plans because they wanted to work around you. (The W's are having a rough family time at the moment because Grammy, L's mom, has been in the hospital from a stroke and two broken hips) So, my mother didn't want to plan a huge early dinner if the only visiting hours from Grammy were at the same time.

I explained this to L. She didn't think it was nice or considerate of my family, she was bothered that we want to go see Grammy. I blocked her out for a few minutes as she went on a tangent about how awful Grammy is and how she looks like death. (Great pep-talk!) I reeled the conversation back to Easter, again by inviting her and dad to my parents house. She declined again, always does, and then I said "Actually I figured you would get together with dad's family, have they planned anything yet?" And then she tells me...

Not only did the family plan something, but they declined and aren't interested it that. Wait, what? WE ARE! I want to see S's other grandparents and cousins, I want to go to a family luncheon at a nice restaurant. But L explained that she "want's no part of it". It is so sad. They live in the same city and can't even manage to get together on Easter. Then we are stuck not participating too because we certainly cannot leave his parents home alone.

There is some background: On Saturday we invited everyone to the Olive Garden to celebrate S's graduation. L & D will both be there. L did say it is just too much for her to do both occasions. But this is way after she explained how much her and dad don't need dad's side of the family. They / She never even considered how S and I might like to celebrate the biggest holiday of the year.

The thing is, is that L makes so many excuses and creates so many stories that you never know what the right one is. This whole deal could be that she is ill (she really is) and she cannot go to two big outings in two days with out major repercussions and she had to choose. But it could also be one big fat lie so that she doesn't have to go out with Dad's family, whom she doesn't like. I am leaning towards the latter. Because if scenario A was correct she would have left it at that. Instead, she explained that the Black and White restaurant that the family is going to is 35.00 a person and that they are all so loud and boisterous and that who knows who will actually be there.

Then she dives into a whole guilt trip attempt because we invited them all to S's luncheon. whatever, I didn't even bite. We invited all family in the area, we knew some can't come because they won't be in Worcester until Easter day. So what, Olive Garden only holds up to 16 people and we invited 35. We so weren't offended by any negative RSVP's. I don't have to clear our guest list through L.

So it kept me up. Last night C randomly came in my room and asked if he could snuggle up. I thought it was around six or so, so I said yes. He climbed in and I noticed it was only 1:00. S however, wasn't in bed yet - he was staying up to watch 24 on DVR, so I let C stay. Two minutes later C is snoring and I am thinking about the W family. About us missing a holiday celebration for the wrong reasons. I am thinking that L is really a piece of work. I am thinking that I agreed to go to church with them and then go to their house for a few hours after and that that is a waste of time, we could have gone to church and then gone to be with my family or theirs. They want everything so isolated. It is weird.

My compassion is obviously at a nil grade. Being sick doesn't give you a license to be manipulative... oh wait - it does if your name is L.


I hope life can only get better said...

Oh Boy....L at it again. Can't get any holiday planed with out a big deal. I know how it is...I feel your pain. Todd's parents called and said Easter would be at their house,like they do everyother holiday. Not ask mind you, just tell. So my mom had a crying fit saying what if I had something planned with your brother. My brother? Aside from this wedding fiasco we have not heard from him since christmas! I really don't think that is an issue. But L is playing something. You guys come a long way and have a lot of people to see as always, her guilt gets in the way!!Celebrate the way YOU want. Remember what Easter is about L, sounds like she has lost touch of that. Look up dysfunctional in the dictionary and there is her picture!

Kim said...

Oh boy, I feel for you. Doesnt it suck how you can never plan around everyone? Well dont worry about anyone, You threw the invites out whether they come or not, dont let it ruin your Easter or plans. Happy Easter!!!!!

Jamie said...

Wow. She so needs to get over herself! I know she's sick but that doesn't give her reasons to act the way she does. She needs serious prayer...she cannot be happy living the way she's living. I'm so sorry, J, that you have to deal w/her crap again. I hope that despite all this you have an awesome weekend seeing everyone YOU guys want to see!